The Three Musketeers (1973)

Please don't spend money on this.

Good concept, poorly executed.

good back-story, and good acting

This is a coming of age storyline that you've seen in one form or another for decades. It takes a truly unique voice to make yet another one worth watching.

The young naive and headstrong Gascon D'Artagnan(York, giving the role the charm it needs) comes to Paris where he falls(one of the two grand romances crucial in the novel, and it's pretty good here... the other one, I will not reveal it here, is great) for Constance(Welch, looking hot if somewhat dim), befriends the three musketeers Athos(Reed, giving the serious and solemn air to him that is called for), Porthos(Finlay being bombastic) and Aramis(Chamberlain, sophisticated) and with them, becomes the best hope for saving his queen(the delicious Chaplin... yes, the daughter of *him*) from the scheming Cardinal Richelieu(a menacing Heston, his piercing eyes hiding countless evil plans), Rochefort(Lee, perfect as a villain, as always) and Milady(icy and seductive Dunaway). The acting is spot-on(apart from the top moments... I'll get to the "humor"). This is immensely close to the book(albeit it of course only covers roughly half of it(hence why some of the aforementioned have little to do in this one), given that it's 625 pages long... I can imagine the concurrently produced sequel covers the rest), some lines of dialog(and wit!) taken nearly verbatim... of course a few characters are combined(also, some developments are changed). The action(fencing aplenty!) tends to be fast and covered well(slightly relative to the time of release), manages to balance the no less than 4 heroes who may be going up against at least one enemy each of their own(without us losing track of where people are, or what situation they are in, and without it feeling like any of them are the least favorite of the editor), incorporates just about the entire main cast(including at least one you wouldn't expect!) at one point or another and features a lot of creative choreography, with, for example, a fight taking place in the dark with both duelers having a lamp they have to find the other person with. This shows upper and lower class alike, and how they amuse themselves(or how hard they work!). Now, as I did in my Superman III review, I must now quote Christopher Reeves(R.I.P.): "director Richard Lester was always looking for a gag". Indeed he was. This is overbearingly full of slapstick, with every. Single. Scene having at least one bit, no matter how little it fits(and how difficult it can make it to get into the supposed tension), few of them funny(albeit you may laugh heartily at those) or well-executed(often it's not clear what the joke is, it passes too fast and is not set up properly), but they sometimes surprise and the energy is certainly strong throughout, save for when this element grinds the movie to a halt. There is a little mild(though bloody) violence in this. The DVD comes with a 2 and a half minute theatrical trailer for this. I recommend this to any fan of the source material and of swashbuckling adventure. 7/10

Alexandre Dumas's classic The Three Musketeers seems to never lose its appeal, it gets another cinema version every generation. In the seventies Richard Lester shot such a long film that producers Alexander and Ilya Salkind decided to release it in two parts. This film only takes us to the point of the affair of the diamond studs.Michael York is one truly bumptious Gascon in his interpretation of D'Artagnan. Apparently it's a French mantra that people from Gascony are braggarts and quick to fight. I don't know how well that point is known outside the French speaking world, but it's in the strength of Dumas's tale that we Americans even those who haven't studied The Three Musketeers in high school of college English can appreciate that fact. Because of that fact he manages to make all kinds of enemies, the wrong ones and the right ones. Fortunately the right ones, Athos, Porthos, and Aramis, Oliver Reed, Frank Finlay, and Richard Chamberlain all recognize York's worth and he becomes a companion of The Three Musketeers. The King's own guard, fighting against the encroaching power of France's prime minister Cardinal Richelieu.Charlton Heston adds to his collection of real historical characters portrayed on film with his interpretation of Richelieu. He was hardly the villain in real life that he is here. As he said on his deathbed that he had no enemies, but the enemies of the state. Richelieu was in fact a great French patriot though as a Cardinal was not terribly pious or scrupulous.Richelieu was also not a tall man and the six foot two inch Charlton Heston had to stoop over a bit when playing him. Note that carefully when you watch Heston, especially in his scenes with Christopher Lee as Rochefort. Lee does not lack in the height department either.Three women have substantial roles in The Three Musketeers. Raquel Welch makes a sexy Constance, not quite the innocent that June Allyson played her as in the MGM version with Gene Kelly. Geraldine Chaplin is serene and beautiful, but tragically unloved except by Great Britain's prime minister the Duke of Buckingham {Simon Ward}, France's mortal enemy. Milady DeWinter played by Faye Dunaway is as deadly and beautiful as Lana Turner was in the Gene Kelly film.Personally I've never thought that Hollywood ever got The Three Musketeers quite right. It will never happen I'm sure, but I'd love to see the operetta that Rudolf Friml wrote the music for, made into a Three Musketeers film. Still this one isn't too bad with an accent more on bawdy comedy than anything else. The followup Four Musketeers takes a more serious turn.

Wide-eyed bumpkin D'Artagnan (York) comes a cropper after heeding his father's parting words: "Fight, remember!" Barely minutes after setting foot in Paris, the feisty fellow has already challenged three strangers to a duel: luckily for him, they come by the names of Athos (Reed), Porthos (Finlay) and Aramis (Chamberlain).Interrupted by the Cardinal's guards (who proclaim public fights illegal), they turn their swords on the religious killjoys instead. Realising the able D'Artagnan is more use as a friend than a foe, a new partnership is (at first reluctantly) forged in the wake of the skirmish.Luckily for D'Artagnan, these are just the guys you want on your side when there's a Queen's reputation at stake. The adulterous royal floozy (Chaplin) has given her lover, the English Prime Minister (Ward), her diamonds as a keepsake. Diamonds King Louis XIII (Cassel) would like her to wear to a ball in a few day's hence. Oops.It's up to D'Artagnan and the Three Musketeers to retrieve them. Ranged against our heroes are a deadly spin-doctoring Cardinal Richelieu (Heston), and his one-eyed henchmen Rochefort - a delightfully deadpan Lee.Rumored to have been originally conceived as another Beatles vehicle by director Lester (Paul as D'Artagnan? 'Fat Elvis-period' John as Athos?), it's probably a good job that film never got made, as the stellar cast herein elevates this from caper movie to polished - if somewhat madcap - classic.Oliver Reed's Athos, in particular, is a revelation. The actor plays him with equal measures of brute force and elegance. Unlike other Musketeer outings, 'Flashman' writer MacDonald Fraser's script and dialogue remains pretty faithful to the source material, without tripping over the swordplay (which is refreshingly unshowy and realistic - often a swift kick in the dangly bits will often suffice in the fight scenes).Lester's evocation of 17th century Parisian life, meanwhile, easily matches Terry Gilliam for Olde Worlde atmos - from the dissolute excess of palace life, in which dogs are used as living chess pieces on the lawn, to the squalor beyond the palatial gates. All this, and Raquel Welch as Constance: "I've never washed the legs of a woman", babbles a besotted D'Artagnan. "But I have washed a horse. And with a horse you start at the top."

An opulent farce constructed with a long roster of super Hollywood heavyweights. Filmed on the loveliest of locations the character of the film, peculiarly, comes from it being almost entirely overdubbed. This gives it a surreal feeling, with inserted jokes, in cultured English asides.This doesn't detract from the performances. Raquel Welch and Faye Dunaway are both lovely, the former scatty, the latter catty. Michael Yorke is the green adventure-seeker, the d'Artangnan torn between the two. Richard Chamberlain and Frank Finlay are wonderful amigos but cannot compete with the blasting, hell-for-leather presence of Oliver Reed, so charm their way through their roles. Charlton Heston and Christopher Lee are united as elegant baddies, and Roy Kinnear makes something more than toilet humour of the peasant end of the fun.And then there's the music... ah, the music. Michel Legrand's score might not be the greatest score in cinema but it just happens to be my favourite. 8/10