WitchSlayer Gretl (2012)

Very Cool!!!

Let's be realistic.

The movie's not perfect, but it sticks the landing of its message. It was engaging - thrilling at times - and I personally thought it was a great time.

The film's masterful storytelling did its job. The message was clear. No need to overdo.

It was with very little expectations that I sat down to watch the 2012 TV movie "Witchslayer Gretl". Why? Well, take a look at the synopsis and the cast ensemble, it just doesn't bode well.But still, it could be a surprise and actually turn out to be an enjoyable movie. But no, that was not the case. I managed to last probably halfway through this movie before I finally dozed off and fell asleep. And let me say that it had already been a struggle up to the halfway point to stay awake, because the movie was just boring and didn't offer much of anything interesting.The characters in the movie were two-dimensional and had nothing in terms of being memorable or particularly likable.And the fact that the storyline was just as predictable as it was uninspiring, just didn't help in favor of the movie.I awoke to the end credits and I must honestly admit that I have no intentions of returning to finish the last half of the movie, because I saw enough in the first half, and I can pretty much figure out the rest just by guessing, as the movie was that predictable.The special effects were adequate, although they were on the cheap side of the scale, and that didn't really work out so well for the movie, especially since a fantasy movie should have some believable effects, if not have effects that bedazzle the audience.For hardcore fans of fairy tales, then I am sure that there is something worthwhile on this alternate approach to the classic tale. But for a regular movie enthusiast, not so much.

How can anyone in the movie industry show their faces in Hollywood if they were associated with this complete failure.The screenplay had to have been written by an autistic child of around 7 years of age. No, a 7 year old autistic child could have dome much better. Let's talk special effects. Nothing special about these effects. Terrible and pure 100% amateur. There was a main character of some sort of dog like dragon that was completely animated in a Sims game and screen captured to appear in this disaster. It was so poorly done. Everything about this is poorly done. Looks like they did the entire movie on a budget of $25.00 and spent it all on craft services. 90% of the film takes place in a forest and 10% in what is supposed to be a cave. SO don't look for any mouth watering landscape to fill this turd out. Back to special effects; all the fighting scenes were so poorly scripted and unrehearsed they were actually painful to watch. There were supposed to be all these fancy weapons that just stopped working 1/2 way through the film so they actually stopped putting them in, but the characters were still acting as if they had these weapons in their hands. That had to be the funniest part of this trash. And this was not a comedy by any stretch of the imagination. Then there was the lack of actors. Paul McGillion plays Hansel and he really needs to give all the money his mother spent for acting lessons back to his mother. She wasted her money, I guarantee he never went to the lessons. His entire performance was at the same boring level of a man who just lost his cat. It was that exciting. And sorry, but horse-faced Sarain Boylan was just as painful, trying to ad lib an empty script. Shannen Doherty was given twice her normal daily allotment of Oxycontin and fell asleep at least 4 times while mumbling her lines. Why oh why did you people continue on this complete waste of time? The best part of this tragedy was the end credits.

Don't watch this people! The movie is an overwhelming nonsense! The idea of watching this is probably based on a wish to see magic, to see a new version of a nice fairy tale, to see Shannen Doherty... Well, the plot is complete rubbish, a good character, a pretty girl is being killed by main character for no particular reason, another good character loses her powers with no clear explanation why, the main character behaves so unfair you kinda want him to be killed by the end. Special effects, graphics and decorations are really bad. There's a lot of mangled bodies, blood and unreasonable violence. Actors are not good as well, there's a load of screaming, wild eyes, clumsiness and awkwardness. You get kinda uncomfortable watching them failing their job. Well, this doesn't apply to Shannen Doherty, because despite of all the awkwardness of the movie she acts good. She doesn't look very good though. So in case you wanna watch it just because of Shannen - don't bother, it doesn't worth it.

Most people have read the story of Hansel & Gretel during their kindergarten time. It seems that now is the time to make a different version of the fairy-tales. They have done several version of Snowhite, why not Hansel & Gretel now. The first impression, it is either bad players who don't know how to act properly or a mediocre director who can see that the acting was very bad. This is not something you watch from a movie, but more from a high- school play. The acting was awkward most of the time and on top of that a very low quality costumes and low cost setting. The story-line takes on the time when Hansel has grown-up and he is back to the place where he lost his sister. A little magic here and there to spice up the performance, but overall a very clumsy warlock in on the scene most of the time and trying to kidnap girls (this is another silly Hollywood recipe...., you have to sacrifice women and not men in order to do something magical....). Of course they have to show that there is magic..., when the witches are killed, their body is instantly disappeared... My overall rating is 1, that is for making this horrible movie and spending the money to finance it, but don't waste your time to watch it. You will regret it......