WWE SummerSlam 1996 (1996)

Sorry, this movie sucks

Absolutely the worst movie.

The best films of this genre always show a path and provide a takeaway for being a better person.

One of the worst ways to make a cult movie is to set out to make a cult movie.

Normally I would do a match by match breakdown of the show, but this was so boring that I just can't be bothered. No real match here is PPV worthy. Mero's match is OK, the Boiler Room Brawl is alright, and the main event is a slow, plodding, mess. There's no stand out moment in any of these matches, other than Paul Bearer turning on Taker, and the insanely distasteful Jake Roberts vs Jerry Lawler match. Future me, when you're making your "Worst of 1996" list, put Lawler and Roberts match on that list. The match is just making fun of Roberts' alcoholism and it sickened me to witness that. The show as a whole is just boredom personified. It's so boring, it doesn't even deserve the effort I usually put into these. I don't know what they were thinking with this show, but it just made me really cynical by the end of it. This is not why I watch wrestling!

Shawn Michaels and Vader gave us three decisions, Paul Bearer shockingly betrayed the Undertaker, Sycho Sid took on the British Bulldog and Marty Jannetty had his first PPV match in years in this rather mixed bag of a PPV.Steve Austin was starting to take off and become more popular in mid 1996, so where did they put him on this PPV? Wrestling a pre-PPV match with Yokozuna. That would be one of the last time Steve Austin was left off the card of a major PPV.The first match of the night saw Owen Hart, on song on this night, defeating Savio Vega in one of Sav's better matches. The action was good back and forth and the right guy won, so no complaints from me.The next match saw Marty Jannetty make a return to PPV, teaming with Lief Cassidy (later known as Al Snow) in a four team elimination tag match. Unfortunately for the side calling themselves the New Rockers, they didn't fare too well. Though they at least lasted longer than the Godwinns, who went first. The match came down to the Smoking Gunns (Bart and Billy, accompanied by the smokin' Sunny) and the Body Donnas with the Gunns winning. Jannetty or no Jannetty, tag team wrestling remained in a rut in 1996.Next match saw Sycho Sid defeat British Bulldog. Sid wasn't a great wrestler, but it was hard not to cheer for the big lug, especially here as he mowed through one of Cornette's enforcers. Not a terrible match.Next match saw Goldust with Terri Runnels defeat Marc Mero with Sable. Not a great match, but sitting at home as a teenager, I was much more interested in Terri and Sable. Mero's partnership with Sable (coming about due to their real life marriage) would later lead to the only memorable feud of his career.Jerry Lawler then defeated Jake Roberts in a disgusting match where, for one reason or another, the WWE thought it would be funny to parody Jake's alcoholism. Not hard to see why WWE was on the verge of going out of business at this stage.This led us into the best match of the night, an innovative boiler room brawl won by Mankind over the Undertaker. The match featured crazy stunts, good story telling and most notably the betrayal of The Undertaker by long time manager Paul Bearer, who helped Mankind get the victory.The main event match left me with mixed feelings. While it was true that WWE CHampion Shawn Michaels and Vader had done some nice stuff and the ending, while bending logic, told a nice story, it could easily have been better. Vader actually won the match twice, the first time after a count out, and the second after Michaels had hit Vader with Cornette's tennis racket and been disqualified. But both times Cornette, Vader's manager, insisted that the match restarted. Michaels eventually won with a moonsault, which is fine, except for the fact that Michaels had already kicked out of a moonsault from the 400+ pound Vader. I guess it's not the size that counts, but what you do with it? All in all there was some god stuff at this PPV, but the Roberts/ Lawler match really should be avoided, just offensive nonsense.

SummerSlam '96 was a decent wrestling card with pretty good matches throughout-not the greatest SummerSlam event or WWF PPV ever but watchable enough.During 1996, the WWF were losing against WCW when it came to PPV buy rates and TV ratings. However, the WWF still put on some good events even though WCW events were better.There aren't any bad matches on this event really with the exception of the four corners tag team match. This PPV is memorable in some ways-for starters Jake "The Snake" Roberts makes his first SummerSlam appearance since SummerSlam '91 (where he disrupted the wedding of the Macho Man and Elizabeth). Jake was a Christian in 1996 and whilst he didn't have the killer instinct he had had from 1986-1992, he was still a decent performance.There are four matches that really stand out for me. The late Owen Hart faces Savio Vega in a strong opening match. Sycho Sid faced the late British Bulldog in a powerful battle between two powermen. However, it's the last two matches that were fantastic.The Undertaker faced tough rival Mankind in a Boiler Room Brawl-it was a heated match which ended in a shocker when the Undertaker's manager Paul Bearer (who had been with the 'Taker for nearly six years)turned on him and joined Mankind.The main event stole the show. Talented WWF champion Shawn Michaels faced monster heel Vader (a wrestler who the WWF never capitalised on) in a strong match far superior to the outings they had had on the road leading up to SummerSlam.All in all, a strong SummerSlam event.

WWE Champion Shawn Michaels defended against the 400-pound Vader in the main event of SummerSlam 1996, billed as "Opposites Attack!" Michaels pinned the mastodon following a moonsault to retain his championship. The successful title defense came in the midst of an eight-month championship reign for the Heartbreak Kid -- the longest WWE Championship reign in almost a decadeOwen Hart pinned Savio Vega Tag Team Champions the Smoking Gunns defeated the Body Donnas, the New Rockers and the Godwinns in a Fatal Fourway Match Sycho Sid pinned the British Bulldog Goldust pinned Marc Mero Jerry Lawler pinned Jake "The Snake" Roberts Mankind defeated Undertaker in a Boiler Room Brawl WWE Champion Shawn Michaels pinned VaderOverall Mark: B