Secret Agent Super Dragon (1966)

Although it has its amusing moments, in eneral the plot does not convince.

It's entirely possible that sending the audience out feeling lousy was intentional

There is, somehow, an interesting story here, as well as some good acting. There are also some good scenes

The film's masterful storytelling did its job. The message was clear. No need to overdo.

Secret agent Bryan Cooper (aka Super Dragon) is called out of retirement to investigate mass hysteria in Fremont, Michigan where college students are committing murder and mayhem en masse. He figures out that it's got something to do with chewing gum being handed out in a local bowling alley and he traces the source to Europe where, with the help of a gangster (a dead ringer for Andy Devine) sprung from Sing Sing to give him a hand, he contacts "our man in Amsterdam", Charity Farrell (luscious Marisa Mell), and together they discover an Ernst Blofeld-type megalomaniac hellbent on, what else, world domination... Robotic Ray Danton, with his black patent leather hair and flinty onyx orbs that make him look positively reptilian, was at his best playing slimy bastards and the role of a smarmy, quick-thinking government agent doesn't suit him. He does his own stunts (as threadbare as they are) with all the agility of a mechanical bear and since he's an unlikely babe magnet, Ray's feminine conquests are as absurd as the plot. Amsterdam locations and a bit of tacky flair here and there can't elevate this James Bond rip-off any higher than sub-par but Marisa Mell, here "by special arrangement" according to the opening credits, ups the pulchritude ante as does sexy British starlet Margaret Lee (looking a bit like Diana Dors) as Cooper's Miss Moneypenny-ish "old reliable". Unless you're as fond of the dramatis personae as I am, find something better to do with your time but, that said, there's an MST3K version out there and I'll bet it's a blast.

Let's face it, the James Bond franchise has been a cash cow for decades and decades, so it's only natural that people who would never get past Albert Broccoli's receptionist would want to make their own version of the character and get in on some of the money, er, fun. The results can be wildly variable. Movies like "Our Man Flint" is at the top of the pile, and stuff like Dean Martin's versions of the "Matt Helm" novels are near the very bottom. Films like "Agent For H.A.R.M." are at the absolute nadir, movies that make you want to punish Ian Fleming for ever starting the modern version of the escapist spy thriller in the first place. Judged this way, the version of "Secret Agent Super Dragon" I saw, with English dubbing and razzed in the foreground by the Mystery Science 3000 crew, falls somewhere in the middle.(Unlike some purists, I believe that you can judge a film fairly if you see the MST3K version. I always find them amusing, but I can still give a film a fair chance in spite of the heckling from the robots). The best thing SASD has going for it is the lead actor, who is so incredibly suave and Continental that you can almost overlook his preening smugness. Almost. In order to make the character more exotic and interesting, the screenwriters fall all over themselves to give him unusual talents, especially "yogic control" over his breath and metabolism. Of course, that's one of the ways you can tell a second rate, wanna-be spy screenplay - Bond (especially the Connery Bond) didn't have or need no stinking exotic talents. He was just ultimately cool, tough, and ruthless. Still "Cooper" is pretty good, if somewhat bland, and he can almost carry the movie. What sinks it, in the end, is the awkward English dubbing (I'm sure the dialog sounded less contrived in its original language) and the unconvincing plot, along with less-than thrilling action sequences and florid, uninvolving costumes and locations. (Except for the windmills...those were kind of cool.)I'd watch any of the Bond films (even the lamer Roger Moore ones) a dozen times before I'd watch "SASD" again. Still, as a standalone spy film, this is nice, if tame, fun. OTOH, if you're going to compete with the Bond franchise, you'd better bring something really good to the party (like James Coburn) or you are a bound to look pretty lame in comparison. Trying to compete with Broccoli's brand without having the firepower to back their play costs them at least two stars. So: 4 out of 10.

Super Dragon? What kinda spy name is that? This is one of the better spy movie send-ups, especially because it takes itself completely seriously. The Dragon is remarkably smooth and smug, and his lumpy, cheerful sidekick Babyface is along to help solve the mysteries of dead colleagues, toxic gum and villains who can't stop decorating. Our Hero is worldly ("Fremont, Michigan? That's a little college town, isn't it?") but accident-prone -- he'll stay away from Ludenkelder after this assignment. This movie is colorless as spy movies go, except for the wild colorings in the ladies' hair. ("Betcha that color comes out of a bottle," one character grumps.) Worth getting the MST3K-ized version of this film, especially for musical interlude provided by Joel and the 'bots. Unlike such efforts as Code Name: Diamond Head, this movie actually has some decent locations, including a panorama of foggy windmills that looks like a "starving artists" painting.Be sure to check out Mario Cuomo (well, it sure looks like him) as the art collector with a collection of pen-phones and unlisted numbers. Take my word for it!

This is the kind of movie, like Diabolik, that the French would find funny, but everyone else in the world would think is incredibly DUMB. Man, there sure were a lot of James Bond clones in the late 1960's, and finding them is really a crap shoot. On this one, chances are you'll not like it. A joint project among four countries (and a nice rule of thumb is the more countries involved, the worse the film.) by Monaco, France, West Germany and Italy, the film features none of those countries, but was filmed in the Netherlands. (I can't say I blame these countries for not wanting their country in the film.) Secret Agent Super Dragon himself reminds me of one of those perfect jocks who always got his way in school and nobody would even think of being against. I ended up hating him, and the film. Perhaps if he was more imperfect and human, we could root for him.