Fort Tilden (2014)

People are voting emotionally.

Just perfect...

This is a small, humorous movie in some ways, but it has a huge heart. What a nice experience.

There is, somehow, an interesting story here, as well as some good acting. There are also some good scenes

Rarely have I felt such outright rage at fictional characters. Reading over reviews I am stunned and could vomit by the weirdos who found these two characters endearing. They are not sweet or cute or good in any way. One could even deem them as fitting the banality of evil. Who the heck lets kittens drown ? Allie and Harper are basic betches in Brooklyn who don't have a shred of insight. Harper is the slightly worse of pair. The type of person who thinks they're an artist. But they're empty inside. So most people in Brooklyn. Allie is an SJW type , but Luke warm one at best. These two are so completely clueless and awful that it is quite entertaining for most of the movie. When they finally near their destination but are tired and cranky they find adorable, abandoned kittens. Instead of calling it a day and heading some with lovely kittehs, they place them in a deep trash can and continue their mission. Once failing comically to hang out with two guys they met a party, they get a ride home without saving the kittens. Harper shows the faintest hint of responsibility by calling 911 and reporting that there are kittens in a trash can somewhere The concerned 911 operator stops harper from hanging up and begs her help the kittens since it is about to rain and the kittens will drown. Harper blanks out and pretend her phone dies. So any semblance of caring was too weak to manifest. Allie also shows a glimmer of responsibility when she informs her neighbor that the bike she borrowed from him was stolen. Again, one feels that these women are just abortions of humans. There will be no growth. One wishes that the movies ends with the two characters struck by a large asteroid.

Reading other people's reviews of the film I can clearly see this movie isn't for everyone. But it was absolutely a movie for me!The film is about two recent grads: best friends and roommates Harper and Allie. Meeting two cute guys at a performance neither of one want to be at they make loose plans to meet up with the guys at Fort Tilden the following day where they plan to hook up with them. The following day they set off on their bikes and of course everything that could go wrong does go wrong. Let's get one thing straight: the women are straight up selfish, egotistical, a**holes. Behind their cutesy faux-kind personalities they snipe at one another and others and the more their plans go awry the more their facade drops. They are anti-heroines in the vein of Charlize Theron's Mavis in 'Young Adult'. If you liked that movie, you'll love this one.

I've seen people hound down this film, trying to say it's a hipster collage. That is untrue; this film is really a quite detailed, funny and critical view of the today of near-teenaged, white, monied persons who are lost in solipsism while being...spoiled brats, would actually be a good generalisation. The two headliners try to get to Fort Tilden by bike, which isn't as easy as it sounds (to them). This is like "The Warriors" without the physical violence. As they make their way they find stuff out about themselves while seemingly learning nothing. It's an epic film, in the true sense of the word. I've also gotta say, the scene where one of the lead characters picks up David Foster Wallace's "Infinite Jest" and drops it onto a visible part of her apartment to increase her chance of getting laid later as she hopes to drag a guy back to her apartment is brilliant to a DFW geek like myself.

'Fort Tilden' is the tale of a ten-mile road trip by a couple of tiresome Brooklyn trust fund brats, who head for the beach to hook up with a pair of charmless dudes. Their airhead odyssey consists of lame exchanges and minor fiascoes involving various acquaintances and strangers, so the adventure soon turns into a plodding marathon by bicycle, cab and foot. The 'heroines' are portrayed as spineless selfish simpletons, and although the film is clearly intended to be a comedy, it's short on laughs, wit or interest. The actresses struggle gamely with the pedestrian material, but their characters' feckless behavior and whiny griping leaves one hoping a truck will squash them into roadkill at every intersection. When they finally meet their romantic prospects on a gray windswept seashore, the encounter is just another flaccid flop in a series of screw-ups.