Commando (1985)

You won't be disappointed!

Very well executed

Crappy film

The story, direction, characters, and writing/dialogue is akin to taking a tranquilizer shot to the neck, but everything else was so well done.

An ass kicking triumph from the greatest decade of action movies..., Commando stars big shot Arnie S in a typical no nonsense cool and camp ass whooping action beat-down!John Matrix is a retired special agent who lives in the secluded wilderness with his young daughter Jenny; alas Matrix is forced out of retirement when he and daughter Jenny get kidnapped by terrorists; Matrix is given the task of completing a mission for these bad guys otherwise Jenny will be killed..., but Matrix has other plans, and the clock is ticking.It's a race against the clock for Matrix who only has eleven hours to find and save his daughter and take down the bad guys..., it's always nice when the hero is faced with an imminent deadline as the action portrayed in the film is quickfire and never has the chance to slow down or lose any rhythm. A particular favorite moment of mine happened towards the beginning of the film when Matrix has to escape the plane he has been forced to board, but will he have time to make this daring escape, logic dictates that there wouldn't be, but it's pretty amazing and heart pumping watching Matrix escape to the wheels while the plane is racing along the runway to takeoff, only to jump off at least fifty feet in the air and fall into a pond as the plane has become airborne. That very scene illustrates what the rest of film is going to be about, incredible, improbable feats of strength, impossible and over the top action scenes with plenty of gunfire and crashes (this is an Arnie film after all). Some say Commando is one of Arnie's weaker films with too many cliches and ridiculous tropes, but I disagree entirely, the cliches and the tropes signify exactly what an action movie should be..., Commando and other films of the same ilk aren't intelligent, they don't encourage you to think, they're proper popcorn munchers where you simply sit back and enjoy the over the top grandeur they're offering you. As a whole, Commando is a wickedly simple and highly enjoyable 1980s action flick that doesn't ask too much of its audience, embrace it!

If you're not familiar with my review system, I break up my review into segments. Plot, characters, narrative, acting, writing, visuals, and, in this case (and other action movie reviews to come) action. Without further ado, these are my thoughts on the 1985 action film, Commando.Plot:The premise of Commando is simple. Former Special Forces soldier John Matrix, (btw, one of the most badass names in cinema history) played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, lives in peace with his daughter Jenny, played by a young Alyssa Milano, until she's kidnapped by Arius, a Latin dictator, played by Dan Hedaya who is aided by Bennett, John's former Special Forces partner. Arius requires John to kill someone in power to reinstate Arius as ruler. If John steps out of line, his daughter gets her throat slit like warm butter (according to a sadistic guard). Little did Arius know that he was screwing with Arnold Schwarzenegger. With help from a new friend Cindy, Matrix is ready to kick ass and eat Green Berets for breakfast. And he's super hungry. Commando has a basic premise, and the plot does flow smoothly, though it lacks logic. It doesn't give you enough time to breath and ask questions. It's an extremely cheesy plot, and feels almost like an old 1960s cop show it's so over-the-top, and that's why I'll lay off of critiquing the plot.Characters: Anyone looking for fun characters like in Die Hard or Terminator, will be disappointed with the characters in this film. Save for John Matrix, everyone in this movie is pretty forgettable. If I hadn't looked him up for this review, I wouldn't be able to remember a thing about Arius, who is a primary character. Narry a character development in this movie. By the end, Matrix is still a badass dad, in the end, Cindy is basically the same character she was at the beginning. But, again, this is a cheesy 80s action movie. The camp is through the roof. The characters are forgettable, and harmless.Narrative: The movie does move quickly, and is better as a result. I don't know if a 2-hour Commando would've kept me as engaged as an hour and a half Commando. The runtime is short, it's almost like a TV episode. However, I will say the airport/mall car chase scene is a little longer than it should be, but I don't think it hurts the pacing too bad. The great thing is, they throw is right into the action. In the first minute, some random civilian gets shot up by uzis. The movie never lets up, and I'll say that's a redeeming factor against all the cheese.Acting: The performances in this movie are awful. The lines are delivered so dramatically, there's no subtlety to the acting. So I will say this once more; it works. If I had to fill a container up with the amount of cheese in this movie, I'd need a couple gallons. The campy performances make sense in the campy context of the movie. Writing: Lines are cheesy, causes and effects are cheesy, it's a cheesy movie, end of story.Visuals: Visuals are standard action movie visuals. If I can remember one image, it's John Matrix in cameo makeup.Action: It's campy. But. It. Works. The action in this movie is fun. You can clearly point out the faults, like how blood squibs aren't where they should be, or just aren't there at all. Heck, I thought I was watching an episode of Power Rangers for a second. It is however, fun, like an Arnold movie should be. Commando is a fun, campy 80s action movie that I personally really enjoyed. It's a movie I could pop in and watch any ol' time. Where cheesy plot and bad acting fail, fun and corny action and a fast pace succeed.

Commando is a fabulous over the top action film starring rising superstar Arnold Schwarzenegger. Schwarzenegger obliterates everything that gets in his path on his way to attempting to rescue his kidnapped daughter. Any film that has the main character causally carrying a tree trunk on his shoulder, and then feeding deer within the first minutes you know that you are in for a classic Arnie film. I would say this is definitely a boys film, lots of guns, grenades, rocket launchers, some of the best one liners in any of Arnolds films. The film has since gained a cult status over the years, but at the time of release it was considered to be a lot more serious a film then the way it is viewed now. The film is littered with plot holes and ridiculous scenarios of one man against every one else, however that is also part of its charm. This film is recommended for people that want an easy going and fun action film that requires minimal brain power to enjoy.

A Commando movie? Here it is! Wow! A great one! Just look at the tagline. A huge achievement in the "funny action movie" genre with a mind blowing budget of 10 000 000 $.a commando movieDirector Marc L. Lester known for such classics in the genre as the Stephen King's adaptation "Firestarter","Showdown in little Tokyo" and much more, has done a great job , helping Arnie to show all of his potential in this blasting roller coaster .There aren't any known names in the cast, to draw your attention off from Arnold, like for example Sharon Stone does in "Total Recall".The Plot:The plot is far from original but this is not so important, simply because only a retard would expect deep character development and story narrowing like in the "Godfather".Arnold is John Matrix, a very tough badass (what do you expect) and retired elite Commando who lives a peaceful live in the forest until one day several pricks kidnap his little daughter in order to blackmail him to lead a revolution and to give the power back to an evil dictator.This is a Funny Action Movie because:From the first scene in which Arnold appears, you have to be impressed by his strength and the shape of his muscles. The guy is walking in the forest and carrying a gigantic tree on his shoulder, looking like a lethal killing machine. Basically, in every scene he is beating his chest and screaming "I am the bodybuilding itself".Basically, in every scene he is beating his chest and screaming "I am the bodybuilding itself".And it really looks like Arnie is shooting the film between his chest training breaks. He's full of protein, testosterone and ready to explode. It is very funny when he is cutting woods as well, or when he is naked and playing with his beloved daughter in the river. How sweet Daddy he is! It is a bit like watching Rambo feeding little puppies.The dialogue is so hilarious and dumb that you keep thinking that some 5-year-old kid is the screenwriter. Mr. Schwarzenegger's acting is as stiff as usual, so you definitely won't be disappointed.There are plenty of ridiculous lines as well. For instance, when John Matrix promises to a bad guy that he will kill him last but he kills him before the others (because of the steroids washed his brain) by throwing him off of a rock, this goes like this "Remember, Matrix, when you told me that you will kill me last. " With a cold look on his rocky face, Matrix confesses "I lied!!!!!!" and throws him away. Of course, this line is shaped with a significant amount of hilarious Austrian accent.Happily, there are plenty of such lines like for example "Right? –"Wrong" as is the answer of Arnold after shooting one poor bad guy in the stomach and he dies, being probably the 345th victim of the cold-blooded Commando.The grand finale of the movie can make you feel pain in the cheeks from laughing while you are questioning yourself "How one could make such a movie and meant it to be serious?!" John Matrix is shooting with a machine gun in the dictator's quarters and kills approximately a thousand of mercenaries without even a scratch on his body.Conclusion:You need to be ashamed if you love the Arnold flicks and you've missed this one. It is one of his best and definitely worth your time if you want to make a six-pack without doing even one exercise.Go watch it and tell me what do you think about it after your laughing spasms stop! If they do.funnyactionmovies.com