Aaaaaaaah! (2015)

To me, this movie is perfection.

It's no definitive masterpiece but it's damn close.

A lot more amusing than I thought it would be.

This story has more twists and turns than a second-rate soap opera.

An excellent portrayal of the inner human. Of course it doesn't make sense, it's surrealism. Not enough film makers are bold enough to make stuff this loose. If you get David Lynch, you'll probably get this. I would have liked the actors to make a bit more effort with the grunting. Often, it was too close to words (Toyah was particularly bad). The music is stunning. Very Fripp. Lovely little cameo from the instantly recognisable Alice Lowe.

AAAAAAAAH! is undoubtedly the dumbest film I've seen in a long time, which is no surprise given that it's the brain child of the constantly overrated Steve Oram. The aim of the film is to depict a modern society with one key difference - mankind has devolved to the level of apes and can no longer speak a proper language. What sounds like a potentially interesting premise turns out to be a mere excuse for crude gags, bad taste scenes, and the expulsion of bodily fluids. There's sex and violence here presented in a matter-of-fact way, but the most shocking thing is that good actors including Julian Rhind-Tutt and Toyah Wilcox somehow thought it would be a good idea to get involved.

Well! Two casually dressed men walk into a rainy woodland. One of them, Smith (writer and director Steve Oram) extracts a photograph of a woman in a wedding dress, possibly his wife, weeps and throws it into the bramble. Sobbing, both men then proceed to urinate on the picture before turning and pointing triumphantly at the city on the distant horizon and march off purposefully towards it, communicating only in grunts as they go.Aaaaaaaaah! is a most acquired taste to watch, but a delight to review. It removes itself from any definition, featuring an entire cast of present day, well-dressed Neolithic-style throwbacks. It is many things, and as it features an absurdist extreme portrayal of the human condition, why should it not also be seen as horror? Some have called it a kind of mirror to the 'Planet of the Apes' films; instead of civilised primates living in uncivilised conditions, here we have city-dwellers with modern amenities portrayed as base animals. Any scenes of strived-for humour centre around the penis, defecation, violence and sex. Is it a comment on the decline of society? Who knows! And yet any comedy is reflected purely in the characters - the actual playing, although absurd, is approached with commitment. This grotesque 'parody' is serious business.Lucy Honigman (as Denise) and, yes, Toyah Wilcox (Barbara) live with, provide for, but are repulsed by, their husbands. Honigman has a secret friendship with Jupiter (Julian Barrett), who lives in the garden (in flashbacks, we are given the impression that Jupiter was the head of the family at one time, but has fallen from grace). Noel Fielding, the other half of 'The Mighty Boosh' duo, also has a small part which doesn't last long. If you've seen his scenes, you'll know what I mean.When Smith and his 'number two' Keith (Tom Meeton) arrive, Smith and Denise appear to get married. And it is Smith's new found dominance over the group that seems to thread any storyline this might offer. I quite enjoyed it. I don't know what it is trying say, but it has inspired me to write these words about it, and you to read them. Bless you.

I was lucky to get the chance to see this at the Cameo in Edinburgh on 9-Oct 2015, followed by a Q&A with Steve Oram. Steve reckons he saw a film/documentary about apes where one tribe attacked another - the males of one tribe killed all the males and youngsters of the other, raped the females then sat in the trees looking highly satisfied with themselves. Aaaaaaaah ! is a kind of adaptation of this story with the apes replaced by humans. Toyah is brilliant, Noel Fielding makes a short but entertaining cameo and the soundtrack, original tracks by Robert Fripp, is immense. Looking forward to seeing the Director's Cut with the extra blancmange.