Evil Bong (2006)

Too much of everything

I didn’t really have many expectations going into the movie (good or bad), but I actually really enjoyed it. I really liked the characters and the banter between them.

The movie turns out to be a little better than the average. Starting from a romantic formula often seen in the cinema, it ends in the most predictable (and somewhat bland) way.

Worth seeing just to witness how winsome it is.

Brought to you by Full Moon legend Charles band the company takes on another character and have gone from killer puppets, a psychotic gingerbread man and decapitated shrunken heads to *Drumroll* an evil bong.So a nerdy guy moves into a house with 3 stoners, when one orders a new bong it turns out to be possessed. If you take a hit she drags you into her world (Which is oddly a strip joint) and you'll never wake up.Now nobody can say I don't watch some really weird films and Evil Bong is really up there. What a concept!Clearly Full Moon had high hopes for this franchise as they really pulled the stops out, bringing in actors and prop characters from many of their other franchises such as the Gingerdeadman, Demonic Toys & Trancers. Somehow they even got horror icon Bill Moseley to do a cameo. Clearly it worked as the Evil Bong franchise is ongoing and presently stands at a whopping seven movies!But is it any good? Well, no not really. Evil Bong is stupid in that it knows its stupid kind of way, sadly it's simply not funny enough to pull it off. Even stoner icon (Thats a thing right?) Tommy Chong can't turn things around and though the film isn't bad it's just not even remotely good either. Ironically this is the kind of movie I'd imagine would be better appreciated under certain "Influences".If you go into a movie about a killer bong with high expectations, you deserve to be disappointed!The Good:Loads of Full Moon movie characters/referencesCertainly originalThe Bad:Lots of licensed music, trouble is it's terribleThe structure of the film is awful, seriously a messThings I Learnt From This Movie:Bongs don't need waterMonkey!Death by boobs is one of the btter ways to goI found myself waiting for Alistair to say " Everything you are doing is bad. I want you to know this" (If you get the reference I salute you)

Charles Band is a pretty woeful filmmaker, but at the same time I also sorta admire the guy. Well, maybe admiration is sort of a big word, but his brand of one-dimensional gimmick cinema is a pretty fun throwback to 70s exploitation movies. Band is basically H.G. Lewis with less blood and more inept puppetry. Actually watching one of his movies all the way through seems like a bridge too far though. "Evil Bong" might have an evil bong, but it has absolutely nothing else going for it. Most scenes go absolutely nowhere and do so at an excruciatingly slow pace, while you sit there awkwardly waiting for "so bad it's good"-moments. Eventually those moments do come when Tommy Chong finally shows up, but by then it's too little and too late. Besides, Chong seems to be completely improvising his lines anyway, no way the writer could come up with dialogues this funny. Apart from being boring, the movie also looks about as ugly as a movie can look. It looks like it was shot with a cell phone, I know it's low-budget but this is just ridiculous. Feel free to laugh your ass off at the box, but please leave this one on the shelf.

Okay, the only reason I watched this is because it was in the 'Midnight Horror Madness' collection of eight movies from MallWart. In the ol' discount bin for five bucks. Wow, eight movies for five bucks? Sadly, the few I have watched so far are worth ever penny. Ha. The reason I bought the compilation was for 'Below'(worth twice the cost all by itself), the creepy, haunted submarine movie with Bruce Greenwood and a host of other familiar faces. Good flick! Getting back to 'Evil Bong', it had three hot naked chicks in it so I gave it a star for each one of those. Terrible movie. Shot on the super cheap and not funny at all(it was purportedly a comedy). Tommy Chong tried his best and it was cool seeing Tim Thomerson for about 14 seconds. Plot is as follows. Stoner buys old, voodooish bong, he and his buddies smoke from it, it kills them afterward and there are hot, naked chicks in the weird, supernatural "Gentleman's Club"(Ha) they are sucked into. Avoid this. I enjoyed Charles Band's stuff from about 20 years ago.

I got this movie expecting it to be funny and trippy perfect for the stoned. with a title like evil bong...you'd think it would be good. unfortunately it certainly didn't deliver. It's slow, tacky jokes, the characters don't represent a real stoner. they're wrecked off one bong hit. you can tell the writers didn't know how real Pot heads act. =/ The plot is really dry, it's slow and worst of all.... it's not at all funny. Black people suit stoner comedies much better. The only good bits it when it cuts to montages of cannabis leaves with funky music. but yeah... don't waste your time on this film. if you want a good stoner film, go for Friday or don't be a menace.