Hercules Against the Moon Men (1964)

Touches You

Awesome Movie

If the ambition is to provide two hours of instantly forgettable, popcorn-munching escapism, it succeeds.

what a terribly boring film. I'm sorry but this is absolutely not deserving of best picture and will be forgotten quickly. Entertaining and engaging cinema? No. Nothing performances with flat faces and mistaking silence for subtlety.

So I'm watching people in gowns and togas floundering about in a sandstorm. There's no character development, no plot advancement, and very little dialog, just people struggling to move forward against the biting wind. Not that they're making much progress; I believe they pass the same fallen tree three times. Then again, it might be different groups of actors- all that sand makes it hard to tell who's who. I'm not exactly sure why these people are braving the storm. True, the cave with the alien monsters is up ahead, but with the exception of Hercules, you would think that would be reason for them to go the opposite direction. I'm also not sure what the point of this scene is. It serves no real purpose, and it's about as exciting as a monthly budget meeting.The whole movie is kind of like that, come to think of it. No it's not all as bad as the sandstorm. But it's far from exciting, and it lacks any real reason for being, other than making some money off of unsuspecting kids who figured that Hercules + aliens must equal awesome. Of course, these kids have it better than the ones in the movie. They're being sacrificed to the moon men so the monsters won't destroy their city. Now child sacrifice may sound like the kind of thing that has no place in a children's movie, but in this case the sacrifice merely involves them being thrown into a glowing doorway cut into the mountainside.Now the people don't like giving their children to the unseen moon men, but they're far too weak to fight back. So when Hercules arrives everyone's happy. Everyone that is except Queen Samara, because she's made a secret deal with the moon men to become queen of the world. Later on, it becomes apparent she should have asked a few more questions about how the whole world domination plot works out, but for now she and her cronies do their best to prevent Hercules from reaching the moon men's lair alive.Pretty simple, right? Except that the people in this movie aren't particularly bright. Hercules and his allies in the royal court don't immediately realize that the Queen is allied with these monsters. It then takes Queen Samara a bit longer to realize that her younger sister and her sister's fiancé are helping Hercules. And it's not until much later that the good guys realize that the queen realizes that they know she's… never mind. There's also a part where the Queen uses her magical ability to control men on Hercules. This scene becomes rather confusing, because even though it's been established beforehand that Hercules is only pretending to be charmed, the acting is so hammy as to make you wonder.The poor acting may have something to do with the fact that the star, Alan Steel, was a professional bodybuilder rather than a professional actor. Oh, and Alan Steel isn't his real name. It's actually something Italian. Yes, Hercules Against the Moon Men was made in Italy, with an Italian cast, and has been poorly dubbed into English.Is there anything else to say about this movie? Let's see… Ah, in one scene Hercules escapes a dungeon by bending the iron bars, but later, he's helpless against a net made of ordinary rope. Also, let it be noted that the leader of the monsters bears an uncanny resemblance to a gilded statue of Woodsy Owl. Finally let me say that I was deeply offended by the skirts in this movie. The men's were shorter than the women's. I'm not sure what this production needed more, a new screenplay, or some pants.

"An alien race from the Moon lands in ancient Greece, terrorizing the nearby city of Samar, and taking the population's children as human sacrifices. If that isn't enough, the queen of Samar has made an alliance with the aliens in order to rule the world. Now it's up to Hercules to save the day and free the oppressed townspeople," according to the DVD sleeve's synopsis.Dubbed "Hercules Against the Moon Men" from the original Italian, this features Alan Steel as the titular "Hercules" - really, he's playing "Maciste" this time, but worldly studios and audiences saw Italian strongmen used interchangeably. This is a dreary series entry, with busty blonde Delia d'Alberti leading the main attractions. A long-winded third act drags it down.** Maciste e la regina di Samar (6/27/64) Giacomo Gentilomo ~ Alan Steel, Jany Clair, Anna Maria Polani, Delia d'Alberti

*Spoiler/plot- 1964, Hercules against the Moonmen, In ancient times, an ancient race lands in Greece. They terrorizing the nearby city of Samar taking the cities children as human sacrifices to the moon god. The evil queen of Samar has made an alliance with the moon men so she can rule the Earth. Hercules has to win the day for the poor country people. *Special stars- Alan Steel plays the he-man from Greece. *Theme- Mythical strongmen can make things right. *Based on- Hercules Greecian myths. *Trivia/location/goofs- Italian production. The moon men are stone robots.Many men enjoyed seeing the top heavy actresses in this film thanks to the banded bullet bra costume dept. Science fiction and sword & sorcery type interesting film combo. *Emotion- A unique film of many strange genres but the stars merely sleep-walk through their roles here.

HERCULES AGAINST THE MOON MEN (MACISTE E LA REGINA DI SAMAR) is a bad film, though it's almost passable entertainment up until the last 20 or so minutes of the film. Then, the film shows exactly why it's now listed in the "hallowed 100"--the 100 lowest ranked films on IMDb.The film begins in the land controlled by the insane Queen of Samara. It seems that they have made a deal with some weird rock-like creatures. They'll make the Queen all-powerful and all she has to do is keep supplying them with human sacrifices. Oddly, her people don't seem to appreciate this arrangement and one of them even sends out a request to Hercules (Maciste in the original non-dubbed film) to put a stop to Samara and her rock group. The film is packed with betrayals, a love potion and assorted silly rock monsters and somehow it almost works for the first hour. Sure, there are some unexplained problems, such as: "How does Hercules ALWAYS manage to have his skin glisten like he's just had a baby oil rubdown and wouldn't this tend to mess up the furniture?" "If Hercules is so strong, why does he have to struggle so hard and have such difficulty killing some of the people or getting out of traps--after all, he's freakin' Hercules (or at least Maciste), right?!" "If this is a mythical tale, why is it so slow and ponderous?" "Why, oh, why, doesn't Hercules just snap the Queen's neck early in the film and put an end to everything?! Why dilly-dally?!" However, late in the film, it just goes from dull but watchable to totally stupid. When you see the rock creatures and their weird boss, you can't help but laugh as they seem like the least scary and silliest monsters in film history. Plus, when Hercules has his final showdown, it sure seems to end awfully easily and quickly.Overall, it's a watchable mess but still, clearly, a mess of a film. However, there are a few moderately interesting scenes and Sergio Ciani is some nice eye-candy, so I really think it's current ranking on the worst films list is unmerited--the bottom 500, maybe, but not #92--I've seen many films worse than this muddled mess of a film.