Mondo Topless (1966)

So much average

Best movie of this year hands down!

It’s not bad or unwatchable but despite the amplitude of the spectacle, the end result is underwhelming.

This is a gorgeous movie made by a gorgeous spirit.

'Mondo Topless' is Russ Meyer's pseudo documentary that starts out with snapshots from San Fransisco with narrator (John Furlong) praises the city's progress. Images of San Fransisco is cleverly cut with seemingly unnecessary shots of topless woman driving the car. It doesn't take long when the film turns its focus on different strippers dancing and their recorded conversations about their thoughts and troubles.'Mondo Topless' is visually beautiful film (in here I don't mean the nudity, but cinematography) with many interesting shots. Almost monotonous monologues of strippers over the groovy pop-rock and girls dancing gives the film quite surreal feel. The humor is subtle as left hook from Mike Tyson. The film keeps its tone and rhythm all the 60 minutes, and by the last quarter, it starts to get little bit boring.Russ Meyer is much more talented and smarter than many think based on his films, and 'Mondo Topless' proves his intelligence besides the love of big bosoms.

Mondo Topless (1966) ** (out of 4) This film starts off as a nutty documentary of San Francisco but quickly turns into a tour of the lovely, big breasted strippers of the city. Thankfully this film runs just 60-minutes because anything longer would have really killed the entertainment factor even with the hour running time pushing its limits. The movie is set up as some sort of documentary but being from Meyer you know very well what it's going to be about. We see countless beautiful and big breasted women dance, jiggle and just bounce their breasts all over the screen and while this is certainly fun to watch, it does grow boring before the half-hour mark. The most interesting (look wise) woman is certainly one called Bouncy Babette Bardot who does a few nice tricks with her you guessed it. I think what really kills the entertainment is that we have these strippers telling us their stories and who in the hell wants to hear them? None of the stories are very interesting and all lean towards the boring side. This certainly isn't a bad movie but the director has much better work out there to be seen.

I am sure the now dead Yugoslavian dictator, Marshall Tito, would have had no objections to me renaming this movie so. Though I do think he himself could have appeared in it: his breasts were larger than some that we see here..."Mondo Bimbo" has a great mid-60s feel to it, a colourful and vivacious style that is sorely lacking in today's often overly polished, sometimes sterile-looking movies - not to mention breasts that are REAL. (Oh, them da good ol' days that I never lived through...) No implants filled with dead chemical matter, sticking out of very small breasts, trying to escape their captivity, protesting their imprisonment by impersonating badly blown-up balloons; no, not here.Still, all's not entirely perfect in the world of the 60s dancing harlots. These braindead women need dancing lessons like Paris Hilton needs a lobotomy. In fact, I take that back: I'd much rather have preferred that none of them danced at all. All that motion distracts from what the title tells us this world is really all about (which it is, in a way). Couldn't Russ have told them to keep still just for a single second? Sure, some of them do: some just stare into the camera emptily, grinning like pleased rhinos, but most of them prance around like deranged Elvis impersonators, to the rhythms of often annoying and ear-splitting jazz and blues music.Someone here wrote that "no-one wants to hear these strippers talk". How wrong he is... After all, this movie would have been too dull with just breasts bouncing left and right. Some of the things Russ's bimbos say are quite amusing. I very much doubt that this stuff was scripted: it just seems so painfully honest, so utterly moronic, hence those must have been genuine thoughts exiting the empty heads of these mostly very pretty women.And the winner for Movie's Best Pair Of Breasts goes to... the English-looking woman rolling in mud (also the largest pair). At one point she said that "Playboy Magazine" had rejected her because "my bust-line was too big". I always did hate Hugh Heffner; a niveau riche peasant with no sense of what does or doesn't make a woman beautiful. That magazine is strictly for fans of plastic bimbos...

This is a really great movie, hilarious! The narrator is just ridiculous, they keep calling it "the art of the topless" and how the girls are skilled in the art. Its a good movie to pull out when you have people over and need something to entertain everyone. Basically, its just girls who are topless talking about their jobs or other various things in their lives. It's pretty soft core & the most mischievous things one of the girls says is "When I go to bed, I don't wear a brassiere". The things the girls say are stupid but the movie is pretty caked in satire. The narrator actually says "try to concentrate on this girl as she's talking to you", its a joke! Old style movie but definitely worth it. Plus, it's entertaining! O & A party rock!