Trapped Ashes (2006)

To me, this movie is perfection.

Redundant and unnecessary.

The first must-see film of the year.

Story: It's very simple but honestly that is fine.

This film is terrible.As someone who once starts watching a film finishes it no matter what i have to say every minute seemed like an hour. The directors cannot be blamed each directing the best best they could considering.Neither can budget be blamed as it can with so so many bad horror films.What lets this film down is the truly bad writing.The acting is varied the guy from the burbs doing best the guy from the series the Dollhiouse the worst,once again again poor dialogue is to blame considering how good he was in Dollhouse.The best segment was Saxons which if shown as a Tales from the crypt episode would be considered poor.I now some people have rated this ten,my advice to them is watch more horror films like The Omen 1976,The Exorcist and The Sentinel. The Hammer and Amicus anthology films cannot be considered classics but usually had at least 2 good stories,and even the others were watchable.

Why would a smart and creative guy like Dennis Bartok come up with an embarrassing, insipid, boring, unfunny and revolting piece of pseudo-porn like "Trapped Ashes"?If this is his tribute to "Tales From the Crypt," "Creepshow" and "The Vault of Horror," Bartok has seriously lost his way... and Freddie Francis is probably rolling over in his grave about now. Maybe Bartok should have made that story instead: clueless wannabe screenwriter desecrates legacy of legendary British director of "Tales From the Crypt," causing famed director to rise from dead and turn idiot writer-producer into Hamburger Helper.So why did Bartok do it? Maybe he thought by rounding up a few veteran directors, his picture was in the bag -- no matter how awful the writing was. Or maybe he had an unconscious desire to destroy his chances of ever making it in this business. Hard to say. His therapist is probably the only one who knows for sureBut one thing's for sure: Bartok can kiss his Hollywood career goodbye!

~Spoiler~ I couldn't help getting a little bit excited for Trapped Ashes. It was an anthology horror film bringing the likes of Joe Dante (The Howling), Ken Russell (Altered States), and Sean S. Cunningham (Friday the 13th) together. But something told me not to get too excited because it would only lead to disappointment. Disappointment does not even cover the feeling. Trapped Ashes was a complete waste of time and talent. Really, is this the best they had to offer? Stories about vampire breasts, Asian sex demons, and a little girl that hordes food? The script is terrible and I can't understand what drew these once great directors to this project. Actually, the same can be said after watching Masters of Horror season 2 and Fear Itself. I know there are short stories out there begging to be filmed, but I think the horror anthology might be a hard sell in the future. I can't urge you enough not to see this film.

Tales from the Crypt like anthology of a group of people on a studio tour who get trapped in a "psycho" like house and tell ghost stories to escape. Of interest mainly for the directors involved-Joe Dante, Ken Russel, Sean Cunningham, Monte Hellman the film itself is a mixed bag. One story has to do with an actress getting her breasts done, another has to do with a Stanley Kubrick like director and an actor friend, Another has to do with a couple who go to Japan and discover a hanged man and the last has to do with a young woman and her twin..or something. Three of the four stories aren't bad, if over long. One (the girl and her twin) is just fair. The problem is the films don't really add up to much, more so that the sting in each tale is left for the very end of the film where we are told what really happened. Its a weird way to do it, and it almost works, but not quite since any tension from the stories are long gone by the final revelations (There is also a couple of lapses of internal logic as a result of the breaking apart.) Worth a look on a slow Saturday on cable. I do have to say that the Ken Russell "Girl with the Golden Breasts" tale is very amusing and a vast improvement over his direct to video home movies. I especially loved his cameo.