Ladies and Gentlemen, the Fabulous Stains (1982)

Nice effects though.

Memorable, crazy movie

This is one of the best movies I’ve seen in a very long time. You have to go and see this on the big screen.

The story, direction, characters, and writing/dialogue is akin to taking a tranquilizer shot to the neck, but everything else was so well done.

Corinne Burns (Diane Lane) calls herself Third Degree Burn as the leader of the band The Stains with her sister Tracy Burns and her cousin Jessica McNeil (Laura Dern). Her mother recently died from cancer. Jessica's mother Linda (Christine Lahti) is her aunt. The girls attend a concert and Corinne talks her way onto the tour. The tour manager Lawnboy is trying to appease the conflict between aging singer Lou of The Metal Corpses and their young opening act The Looters led by Billy (Ray Winstone). The girls are not that good. When The Metal Corpses' guitarist turns up dead, Lawnboy makes the girls the new opening act. The girls become an overnight sensation for Croinne's attitude, her feminist tirades, and her edgy look championed by TV reporter Alicia Meeker despite the band's lack of musical skills. Her young female fans call themselves Skunks.This is a cult movie from the 80's. I do remember the trailer back in the day although I don't think it had much of a run in the theaters. This is about fame in the new age of MTV. It's a little dated now but it has a certain punky indie edge. The best part is Diane Lane. She has IT. She is this young girl with attitude. There are also some notable big screen newcomers. This movie thrives on Lane's attitude but it can get monotone.

This isn't the worst movie ever made, but it certainly isn't worth all the praise I've read about it either. It's a good enough cult film I suppose, but even as such it's unremarkable in pretty much all aspects other than as a time capsule of early-80's teen/punk rock culture. Also, you get to see Diane Lane's underage boobs, which is also a plus. Not quite sure how they managed to pull that one off. Anyway... the story had a lot of potential to be compelling and provocative, and the premise was certainly ahead of it's time, but overall it still managed to fall flat. At no point do you truly feel involved, and there are a lot of points that just don't make much sense at all. Still, as a look into that particular era, it's worthwhile viewing. Also, teen boobs.

This movie is awesome. I first saw this film in 1983 when i was 15 on a TV show called "Night Flight" (anybody remember it?), fell head over heels in love w/ teenage Diane Lane & have never forgotten the impact this film made on me & watching it recently brought back many memories. I have been looking for this film for 20yrs & i finally found a copy! It basically tells a very cynical & realistic tale totally bashing the music industry. Young female nobody has ambition to be somebody, forms a band called The Stains with her cousins (one, a very young Laura Dern), goes on the unglamorous rough & lonely road with 2 other very chauvinistic rival male bands--a has-been-on-its-last-legs headliner & an up & coming punk band. Fee Waybill of the Tubes is great as the has-been & Paul Cook of The Sex Pistols has another great role as the lead singer of the punk band. BTW, the songs in this movie are very good & very catchy---you will find yourself singing "We're the Professionals!" for days! As the girls rise to the top they're punk hair, clothes & attitude become a symbol of young female power & all the rage with young girls everywhere. they're slogan "We Don't Put Out" becomes the anthem of girl power that sweeps the nation. They're rise to the top is squashed by the backstabbing music industry & the conservative male dominated American media. The fluffy MTV styled video at the end is the icing on the cake! This movie is awesome because it takes on so many issues without ever losing the central story of this film or becoming cheesy or preachy. They really don't make movies like this anymore & I can say that this film is an unequivocal classic with Diane Lane putting on the performance of her life. wow! what an actress. Even the so-called "indie" films of today try too hard to be "shocking" & just end up being predictable & exploitative, never coming close to the realistic telling-it-like-it-is nature of this film. The thing I don't understand is why this film is never shown & why its never mentioned. I hear there is a "Making of Ladies & Gents The Fabulous Stains" with all the actors talking about this film that i would LOVE to get. This movie was also a huge inspiration to Courtney Love I've also heard. Check this film out if you can find it!!!!

I was a student in high school when the film crew and actors/actresses came to Vancouver, British Columbia Canada to film this movie.They had a radio contest at the local radio station called 14 CFUN and they wanted people to come down to the radion station to sign up to be "extras" in the movie. I had never done this before, but took a chance and was selected. I was to play a "skunk".We filmed down at the exhibition grounds of the P.N.E. {Pacific National Exhibition}. I missed 3 days of school to do this movie and had the time of my life! Actually, it was even more fun when I found a friend of mine was also picked as an extra.I remember meeting and getting the autographs of the Sex Pistols and Clash members who were there. I actually didn't even know that there were other "stars" in this movie until I had found this website and saw the cast list.I also remember eating way too much "White Spot" {burgers and fries}. It seemed like that is all they fed us. I had been "called back" for a 3rd day of the shoot because they had chosen me for some "close-up shots".....much to my surprise. I remember the costume and the makeup that we wore as "skunks". We all wore see-through red blouses with very high pumps on our feet. The makeup was kind of "skanky" and the big white stripe that they put down the middle of your hair. I can barely remember what we looked like.I signed a contract with Paramount Pictures when the movie was still called "All Washed Up". I never did see it. Actually, when I was in Waikiki, Hawaii a couple of years later, we had been watching "sumo wrestling" on one of their channels and had fallen asleep. When I woke up, the credits to this movie were scrolling by!!!!!I was soooooo upset about it, because I had never even seen the movie.I have still yet to find this movie and would like very much to attain a copy of it on DVD.