7 Chinese Brothers (2015)

Wow, this is a REALLY bad movie!

Good films always raise compelling questions, whether the format is fiction or documentary fact.

This movie feels like it was made purely to piss off people who want good shows

One of the most extraordinary films you will see this year. Take that as you want.

This is not a complex movie! It's a nice simple story of a basic slacker biding his time in anticipation of an inheritance. In the mean time we see and experience his daily life.Director/writer Bob Byington brings us a story of 'Larry' (Jason Schwartzman) who feels no need to do something with his life because he is the sole survivor in his grandmothers family. His grandmother (Olympia Dukakis) resides in an assisted living retirement center. Larry occasionally visits, mostly when he needs cash. He knows his grandmother is wealthy and he is confident he will inherit all because he is the only 'family' she has. Larry is comfortable with his dog Arrow and a bottle of booze and job at a quick lube auto service.The day arrives when he learns his grandmother has passed away and Larry makes a move which turns out to be a big mistake! And in his rush to know what his inheritance will be he botches the memorial service. The estate lawyer explains to Larry how 'the will' is portioned out. At this point Larry realizes his past has caught up with him and there's nothing he can do about it now.This is a charming quirky film that is funny and lighthearted. Any indie cinema buff will enjoy this fine production and acting by some well known actors.

This film is a case study on why film criticism exists, to separate the chaff of it from the wheat it pretends as. Neither an evolution nor simulcrum of Lost in Translation, Office Space, or Bottle Rocket, this extended screen test of Jason Schwartzman inhabiting deep suburban environs as a narcissist layabout was likely pitched to distributors as a mashup of all three. Writer-director Bob Byington begins with an old R.E.M. song, 7 Chinese Brothers. This song, from the band's Reckoning album, was naught but a prank; it was Michael Stipe singing the liner notes to a random gospel LP he'd found laying around, which the studio engineer mistakenly recorded, and which the band, finding the track's accidental provenance hilarious, formed into a nondescript, mildly jangly tune. Does this near non-song by R.E.M. inform Byington's film in any measure? No, except that he cues the song at the end credits so that the key grips might have a mildly jangly ruffle and flourish behind their accrediture.From the song Byington derives the title, and upon the meaningless title Byington builds no story whatsoever, and by no story I mean not even a Seinfeldian non-story proposition. Jason Schwartzman is the lead as "Larry." Schwartzman, who is a celebrity and a very good actor, and who might perpetually attract some long-tail audience interested in watching him do anything--say, selling peanuts in a ballpark vendor's uniform-- for a duration of 76 minutes, is required by Byington to move in and out of bland sets (a quik lube garage, a dingy convenience store) and make slight actions (throw a hat at a Mazda, deny your grandmother a sip from a Big Gulp) that are supposed to stand in for the plot or un- plot as it were. Nothing worth filming, nothing that would be worth filming by students, is there.These are petty crimes against cinema Byington is caught at, but that should be no taint against Schwartzman, who screen tests as plumly as ever, or indeed against Tunde Adebimpe or Eleanor Pienta, who check in as friendly companions who join us in wondering just what is supposed to be fascinating about a character who is simultaneously so self-possessed and so lacking in initiative of thought, credible emotion, or stirrings. Rather than screening this movie, Schwartzman enthusiasts are better off hunting down Hotel Chevalier and spending the time gained from unspent viewing balancing their checkbooks.

Bob Byington has a following. No doubt about it. They flocked to the IFC in New York to see 'Seven Chinese Brothers'. And after the showing, to quiz Byington on his film. As everyone who has seen the film discovers that the narrative is thin gruel. Jason Bateman is plays the 'nebbish' Larry, who drinks his life away in small doses. A loner, he finds companionship with his dog Arrow. Talented that he is, he should never play against a dog nor a child. Olympia Dukakis does a cameo as his grandmother, who leaves him a spanking almost new Mercedes, but not her million dollars that goes to Larry's buddy Major, an aide at the nursing home grandma resides. She knows her Larry who won't make much of his life. In the end, Larry find a life of sorts at a lube shop with a pretty manager whom he has a thing for. But, will it work out, we cannot say for sure. One thing, Byington lets us in on is that in the end, Larry has found a sober zen moment with Arrow as this film ends after 75 minutes. What about the title? 'Seven Chinese Brothers' is a well known children's book. by Claire Huchet Bishop in 1938. Still in print today, it is a standard in library children's room. Bishop retells simply a story of seven Chinese brothers whose collective strength put a check on an evil emperor who cannot escape his downfall. No hit of a hero in Larry. Quite the contrary. Some posit, Byington had a kung fu in mind. Sorry old darlings. The nearest to a Kurosawa that 'Seven Chinese Brothers' comes to that genre is that Larry is a loner...a ronin, a masterless samurai. Forget about that thought. If the film has any strength it's Arrow and Bateman who a much underrated actor and la grande dame that is Olympia Dukakis. Wait till the DVD comes out, for the price of admission is not worth opening your wallet.

Absolutely charming and hilarious. Jason Schwartzman is pitch perfect as Larry, a slacker who gets fired from his job in a restaurant at the beginning of the film, sipping through a straw from his Big Gulp. Schwartzman isn't the only tour de force in the film, his dog Arrow makes the perfect comedic counterpart, exasperated and non-plussed at many of Larry's diatribes and philosophies. Bob Byington deserves a lot of credit as well, his previous film Somebody Up There Likes Me is equally hilarious, but 7 Chinese Brothers is less surreal and more rooted in character and pathos. 7CB has lots of mainstream appeal and will undoubtedly be listed in with other iconic Schartzman roles. 7CB is always surprising, always pushing at the edges of conventional narratives. The film works so well because it is coming from a very unique voice of storytelling and sense of humor. It's exciting to see a film come out like this and almost instantly feel like a comedy classic. Do yourself a favor and get a big gulp of 7 Chinese Brothers.