Self Made Maids (1950)

hyped garbage

Brilliant and touching

A waste of 90 minutes of my life

There is, somehow, an interesting story here, as well as some good acting. There are also some good scenes

The worst Stooge short is, without a doubt, "Cuckoo on a Choo Cho", made two years after this, but this is a close second. I can't think of ANY shorts with Joe Besser that are funny, but even the worst of those abysmal efforts pales in comparison with this and "Cuckoo" (as bad as the Joe Bessers are, I'never never given any of them a "2", as I did for this one). No use going over the "plot", as other reviewers have taken care of that. Suffice it to say that this short is almost completely humorless (in that respect it's one up on "Cuckoo", which WAS completely humorless). The Stooges play themselves and their girlfriends, all of them badly. The physical stuff--head butts, eyepokes, etc.--are without exception very poorly done and the "script", for lack of a better word, is witless, the Stooges' delivery is way off and the whole thing is a huge waste of time and should never have been made. It's embarrassing and painful to watch. Skip it at all costs.

Yikes - Moe, Larry and Shemp play themselves AND their finances, "Moella," "Larraine," and "Shempetta." You can easily identify the last two but Moe did a good job (and is the ugliest woman ever!). I wouldn't have known it was him. Moe plays a third role - the "girls" father, in which he actually looks very distinguished with a normal hairstyle. However, twice he was in the same scene and he spoke with his lips not moving! The costume and makeup department worked overtime on this picture but Columbia Picturs saved money as the Three Stooges were the only actors in the movie.They also played Scottish bagpipers and newly-born babies and maybe an outfit or two I forgot.....Also, there was a good "I'm mortified" Jimmy Durante impression, done by Larry The boys are French artists but not exactly Monets. For instance, Shemp paints upside down paintings. The "girls" pose for them despite having ants all over them! There is lots of kissing, holding hands, and hugging here - a little too much considering it's all just between the Stooges!

"Self Made Maids" is not the greatest Three Stooges comedy ever made, but I think we can all agree that the neatest thing about it is the fact that the boys play all parts in the film. (Boy, are those women ugly!) The following are the most memorable sequences from "Self Made Maids." The final shot of the baby Stooges is perhaps the funniest bit in the film. There are a couple of amusing gags during the chase sequence, particularly when the Stooges disguise themselves as Scotsmen imitating bagpipes and when they trip over their own bench trap. While posing for their portraits, the Stooges' girlfriends (Moella, Larraine, and Shempetta) cannot stop scratching themselves because their flowers are full of bugs; the camera then pans to an already finished painting, on which the subjects (played by Shemp and Larry) briefly scratch themselves as well! And lest we forget the song originated in "Wee Wee Monseiur" (1938) and "Nutty but Nice" (1940), "Zee lollipop, zee lollipop, zee lo-lo-lo-lollipop! (Woo woo!)"

Give the Stooges credit: they weren't afraid to experiment. Imagine, portraying their own girlfriends! They did a clever job, and did not have to rely on camera trickery (Columbia's shorts department would not have provided them with sufficient funds to do so, anyway). The Stooges did a little "mix'n'match," but to be honest, I can't remember who was paired with whom. Let's see, was Moe Shempetta's boyfriend? Well, anyway, the Stooges weren't exactly attractive women, but they did have a sort of home-spun innocent charm. Now there's a triple marriage I would have absolutely loved to see. Too bad the ladies' old man is dead set against it, and perhaps you can't blame the guy. Now I love Moe, but three roles were just too many. I think Vernon Dent would have been great as the girls' father, but, what the hell, Moe still works. I think after this short was made, the world witnessed a spate of occurrences where prospective bridegrooms tickled their intended spouses' father into submission to procure his permission to marry his daughter. This was about 1950, right? Remember that famous case in Tunisia? Those Stooges, they were innovators, years ahead of their time. Just watch this surreal film, and you will agree.