Confidentially Connie (1953)

Simply A Masterpiece

Great Film overall

A lot more amusing than I thought it would be.

This is a coming of age storyline that you've seen in one form or another for decades. It takes a truly unique voice to make yet another one worth watching.

According to IMDB, "Confidentially Connie" lost a ton of money for MGM and I can understand why...the story was just plain strange. Not so much bad as weird and hard to imagine WHY they'd do a story like this! Apparently, some of the IMDB reviewers REALLY hated it. All I know is that it was a pleasant and weird time-passer.The film begins back East. Joe Bedloe (Van Johnson) is a professor at a small college where they seem to pay their faculty very, very little...so little that his wife Connie (Janet Leigh) has to make a lot of cutbacks. One cutback is meat...something they've learned to do without. But when Joe's dad, Opie (Louis Calhern) visits, he's shocked...and worried because Connie is pregnant and he KNOWS women need lots and lots of meat when they are pregnant! So, he conspires with Connie and the local butcher to provide meat at half price. But when the other professors families learn that the Bedloes are getting a great deal on meat, Opie is forced to pay for EVERYONE'S discount meat...otherwise Joe will find out about his father's interfering. To me, however, I just thought Joe was a jerk and should have been grateful for the help.Was there some sort of meat crisis of 1953?? I was very confused by the film and its notion that many folks couldn't afford meat back in the day. Regardless, the idea of Opie giving his daughter-in-law his meat is a strange notion in a film. Not bad...just odd overall...mostly because the cast did a nice job with the thin material they were given.

This is a cleverly written, enjoyable comedy that was topical in 1953, and still has some things to say about today's world. Topical in '53 because meat prices were high due to shortages. And the price of meat is, surprisingly, a major plot point of the story.Van Johnson is a young poetry instructor at a college in Maine. His wife, Janet Leigh (in the title role), is pregnant with their first child. They and the other newer members of the faculty are trying to make ends meet, because teachers don't make much money. Pregnant women (at least in 1953) are supposed to get their nutrition from a diet that includes a good amount of red meat. But the inability to pay for it means a lot of fish and other substitutes, instead. This causes Van to feel inadequate and Janet to question whether they're able to afford to raise a child. Coincidentally, Johnson happens to be the son of a Texas cattle rancher (Louis Calhern), and his father has always wanted him to give up what he considers a silly job and return to work the ranch. Janet, worried about their future, wonders if that may not be such a bad idea.Calhern decides to pay the kids a visit, and he drops in unexpectedly. Meanwhile, Van is in line for a promotion, but only if he can win over his petty, curmudgeonly boss (Gene Lockhart). The promotion is just what the little family needs to make raising a future child less of a financial hardship. But Van is constitutionally incapable of being an "apple polisher," and his prospects for the promotion diminish every time he socializes with his boss.Early on, we see a scene that demonstrates Van is a good teacher. It's clear he has a calling to the profession. So we want him to follow his heart. But when dad comes he makes a pretty good case for the ranch as a future prospect.The plot gets more complicated from here on, involving a butcher shop price war. But what's nice about the film is that people are more reasonable and thoughtful than they often are in films. This is a refreshing aspect to Confidentially Connie. Characters attempt to see one another's point of view. They attempt to be nice to one another. They're good people. There really is no villain. There are some wise observations about relationships (husband-wife, father-son, father-in-law- daughter-in-law), and some intelligent arguments made for the importance of teachers.This isn't a big, expensive film; most of it was filmed on the M-G-M back lot, in black and white, and it's less that 80 minutes long. But it's a solid, smart little comedy and I think you'll be diverted, entertained, and amused. No belly laughs, but a lot of chuckles and grins.The stars are appealing. Van Johnson proves once again that he was underrated as an actor, Janet Leigh is as believable as ever, and both of them radiate charm. Louis Calhern has to stretch a bit to play a rancher, but stretch he does. His acting is big but doesn't go over the top, and he plays a very winning part. Walter Slezak (as a butcher involved in price wars) does a great job, and Gene Lockhart is perfect as Van's boss. In other parts, Marilyn Erskine and Hayden Roarke do good jobs.Direction is by comedy ace Eddie Buzzell.

The dated "Confidentially Connie" represents the era when people viewed meat as one of the healthiest foods, and also portrays a nuclear family (husband's the breadwinner, wife stays home and cooks). I think that the movie wants to see itself as a satire on the desire for success at any cost, but it comes across as a "Leave It to Beaver"-style story. True, the price war was funny, but now that we know that red meat causes heart disease and colon cancer (from which the carnivorous John Wayne probably would have died had he not smoked himself to death).Basically, it's a hokey movie. And personally, having been to Texas but never Maine, I can say that I'd never trade Maine for Texas.PS: Hayden Rorke, who played Simmonds, is best known as Dr. Bellows on "I Dream of Jeannie".

This is very possibly the worst movie I ever watched. But my wife and I sat through it, remarking later that it was as riveting as a slow-motion train wreck. This movie is so bad, we wondered how it was ever put on film. From initial premise to final scene, everything about this movie is the pits.The premise of the movie is that the faculty at a small Maine college (symbolizing small colleges, in general) is so underpaid that putting red meat of any kind on the table is an extreme luxury, and a real budget-buster. On the other hand, they have money to eat plenty of fish and pay for loads of vitamins. The economics of this film also permit sacrificing cigarettes in order to eat lamb chops. In 1950 how much did cigarettes cost - 20 cents a pack? Whew, that seems like a lot of foregone smoking!The meddlesome parent of a newlywed couple is hardly an original idea for comedy, but here it never generates a smile. The young couple are portrayed by Janet Leigh and Van Johnson. After his initial appearance, Van Johnson portrays his character as Hamlet, Prince of Denmark, in the deepest of tragedies. Meanwhile, Louis Calhern, Johnson's "Pop" up from Texas, is hamming it up as a wealthy cattleman. Janet Leigh, somewhere in between, seems to think she is June Cleaver before giving birth to Wally. The director never seems to have any of them pulling in the same direction at the same time, consequently the boat just goes 'round and 'round and eventually capsizes.The preoccupation with meat makes for one of the most bizarre plots ever made into a picture by a Hollywood studio. It was so freaky that I admit to never paying attention to whether the lines, themselves, if delivered by other actors under the direction of another director might have been funny. Let me think... NAAAAH, No Way! But, if you are a movie junkie and want to see a historically bad film - and I don't mean cheesy, like some B sci-fi flick - check this one out. You'll be puzzled hours after you watched it - "Just what hit me?"