Diary of a Tired Black Man (2009)

So much average

Good concept, poorly executed.

This is a coming of age storyline that you've seen in one form or another for decades. It takes a truly unique voice to make yet another one worth watching.

Blistering performances.

I saw this movie, but I left it on at night and then the DVD player was busted. So, in essence, I really didn't pay much attention or know what it was about. When I saw the main character's face on the cover, I assumed the man was still angry about his people or something. I mean, when you look at it, what's he so unhappy about? Is he looking at me? You? I'm not sure what is going on. The title says he is pretty tired, but he appears to be rather disappointed.Then again, the woman seems to be rather disappointed with him. I sure hope he was able to provide a nice trip down under or something. That's in this movie right? I guess that's what I get for getting a movie to just mess around with for two hours. Seriously though, the title and the cover is funnier than the movie. It needs to be Photoshopped and put into various things like... An American Tail or something, I dunno.

If I could give negative stars I would, cause frankly, this doesn't even deserve 1 star. I'll keep it brief. There are so many problems with this video --- too many to count.First -- it's "labeled/categorized"as a 'drama' i.e. narrative film. That is one big glaring mistake: It is not a narrative film. It is a documentary. (this video is an insult to the genre, "documentary")This is just an arrogant, self-righteous, one-sided, conceited, ignorant, self-indulgent commentary on the STEREO-TYPE of an "angry black woman" -- condescending African-American women who carry this self-inflicting, self-destructive disease known as, "Angry Black Woman Syndrome".The majority of the men in this video, including our Lord-Almighty, director/savior, Mr. Tim Alexander merely come off as being completely ignorant, selfish, chauvinistic, and simple minded. He and his posse of "men" criticize all the women around them, surrounding them in their small, unimportant lives as being the cause of all their pain and torment. Okay, can we all say, "Martyr"!!!And he edits most of the women to either look foolish or support his opinion --- wake up folks, it's called "EDITING".Give me a break! I am not a woman. I am not African-American. I am not white. I am a male. And I think this was so infantile and stupid, it ironically defeated the director's point by making all the men testimonials look completely infantile- -- the men (including director, Tim Alexander) don't even seem like they could get a G.E.D. if their life depended on it. But I love how we're so blessed to see our very own Tim Alexander give talks in coffee shops and parks like he's some expert on gender/race relationships. Who is this loser, besides just being a narcissist.Oh and for the record, I have dated several African-American women plus I have several African-American male and female friends and none of them (especially the females I've had relationships with) act or even think this way.As it was barely mentioned in the movie, maybe these issues aren't just "black women issues" but rather "Men and Women" issues as a whole. For the Tim Alexander, I know that's a bit too much to swallow, cause after all, he's actually the racist for not seeing the larger picture and realizing it's not a color/race issue, but rather just the standard gender/relationship issues that every one deals with. It'd help if maybe he dated. Then he might actually know what he's talking about instead of just watching Tyler Perry movies.It's actually a shame that film-making tools are so accessible to anyone because it can't stop fools like Tim Alexander who has to take credit for every-single job on the film -- director, cinematographer, editor, writer, original music, make-up --- I mean, come on... seriously... what are you, like 12 years old? Gotta have your name down on everything because you're so insecure with your abilities?And insecure is what you are. It shows inside-and-out. This reeks of insecurities... of you, Mr. Alexander: Narcissist.Finally, the "re-enactment scenes" are HORRIBLE. Why would you cast an African male with such a thick accent (who clearly hasn't grown up in the "American" culture) to be your lead protagonist/victim and mascot for all suffering African-American males? That's like comparing apples to oranges.The female lead/wife who plays the supposed "angry black woman" really has no motive for being angry, other than just your weak script that says she's angry. Look around -- they live in a pretty upper-middle class lifestyle. Where's the stress for her to be so angry? It's not like the husband is a dead beat, or unemployed, or having an affair, or neglecting their child... It's not even that they're a blue-collar working class family but the wife just always demands more.SORRY TIM. But the good news is, the world needs plenty of bar tenders, so why don't you start there and leave the documentaries and film-making to the people who are smart enough to make a good movie.

The documentary portion of the movie made a good effort at dealing with relationship issues; however, it still came across with an biased slant against Black women. Despite this attempt at highlighting and solving problems, since it focused on how angry Black women make good Black men tired, what we ended up with for the most part was not at all balanced in perspective.Yes, the documentary portion portrayed real people answering real questions, but at some point, the writer/creator must step in with facts, step in with objectivity, with examples of Black couples' success, and with steps towards healing, right? Well, the space and opportunity to do that was filled with a satire-like and wholly unrealistic melodrama. The main character, James, a near perfect Black man, and his trials and tribulations with a angry wife.James was successful career-wise, the home-purchaser, provider, good father, faithful in the face of temptation, and church-going man. A viewer might expect that many of the men being interviewed in the documentary portion would have similar experiences--That would have truly been an eye opener to any women who may be losing hope that James exists. However, this did not seem to be the case. For the most part, it was not clear who these men were...if they were in healthy relationships or not, if they went to church regularly, were faithful, or were "James". What is clear is that they are Black men and they are "tired." Many Black men and Black women are tired of the divisiveness and are seeking to come together in a real place where we have mutual understanding. Some of that understanding comes from recognizing that some of these issues are gender-based and affect other races while some of these issues are people issues (to generalize a point: good guys like bad girls/good girls like bad guys). I actually sensed that the writer may have been "angry". Although anger was never defined and how anger emerges was never identified, from my own education, I sense that this movie was not made in the spirit of love and healing.All in all, I think the movie could have made more of a plea for each person (male, female, Black, or of other races) to keep being good and to be honest, to trust/to be trustworthy, to self-reflect, to hold the self accountable, to hold one's friends accountable for how they treat their significant others,to talk to each other (not inflame -anger-, finger point, or blame--that makes people defensive). Despite this, I think it may elicit conversations and motivate someone to take a call-to-action to decrease the communication gap between men and women (Black or otherwise) and promote ways we can make peace and progress with one another.

Mr. Alexander's independent film, "Diary of a Tired Black Man" should be required viewing for anyone who might want to improve their current relationships or get insight into things that might improve future ones. Ostensibly, it is about black relationships but when you view it, it will be evident how universally applicable the concepts are. Be warned! This is a film done without the backing of any Hollywood studio whatsoever and realized only through the tenacious efforts of its director as well as actors and actresses who felt the subject matter was vitally important. As such, some of the scenes may come across as a bit raw, but no more so than the early efforts of a Spike Lee in his films "...Bed-Stuy Barbershop" or "She's Gotta Have It". What is important is the message gets through loud and clear and what a message it is! I will not go into specifics, but when the trailers and publicity describe this as a man's answer to films like "Waiting To Exhale" and some Tyler Perry offerings, they are not overstating things. If you are a woman or man who believes the "conversation" on relationships in general and black relationships in particular have been too one-sided, too slanted solely toward male vilification, then this film is a resounding and profound counterpoint. Run, don't walk, to your nearest store to get this. Buy multiple copies because as you view it, I promise you will think of someone in your life that needs to see it. Before I go I need to say something else. It never ceases to amaze me how most detractors from the film try to attack some of the filmed scenes. Here's my reply. Go rent a copy of "El Mariachi" the first film by Robert Rodriguez. It is a great film . . .but the acting is not done by Oscar caliber thespians. As a matter of fact, the leads in DOATBM, Jimmie Jean-Louis and Paula Lema, are actually (in my opinion) much better in their film than the freshman-like actors in Robert's. But even if my opinion would not be universally shared, I find this tactic of going after the actors- and after a film obviously shot with a limited budget (read: absolutely no $)- to be a cop out. It is a way of avoiding the true strength of the film, which is, of course, the feedback given by the men and women in the documentary parts. I believe one reviewing critic had it pegged correctly. To paraphrase: The filmed vignettes serve merely to ask questions; it's the feedback that supply the viewpoints that are the heart of Mr. Alexander's opus. But naysayers virtually all to a man and woman avoid comment on these parts and for good reason- it is hard to criticize truth. Not that everyone commenting is correct, but their replies are largely their honest opinion. And this is conveyed so well in Tim's film that in the final analysis their testimony becomes unassailable. My advice to those who want to pan the film. Try going after the essential truths presented not just by the filmed scenes, but by the back and forth commentary of the men and women in the street. If you can attack and deny their truth, then your gripes about Tim's film might have some merit. But if you cannot- and I suspect this is something that will be beyond most- then you need to watch the film again and ask yourself honestly exactly what about it is truly making you uncomfortable . . .then start your own healing process.