The Priest's Children (2013)

Truly Dreadful Film

Bad Acting and worse Bad Screenplay

Clever, believable, and super fun to watch. It totally has replay value.

Good films always raise compelling questions, whether the format is fiction or documentary fact.

I really enjoyed watching this film. The film will be screened in Baku, Azerbaijan in November, within the framework of the traditional European Film Festival being held every year. This drama-comedy film is awesome in its storyline, actors professionalism, and the topic. I really recommend watching this film to everyone. I am sure the audience in Baku will also love it :)Good luck Vinko Bresan!

You could get a few good laughs at few witty situations and that's it, other jokes are just too simplistic, just swears and contrasts with no buildup, e.g. priest is doing something you wouldn't expect him doing and so on, which for some reason works for Croatian audience, especially if the swears are in Croatian language. Although it starts fairly promising, of all the crazy funny possibilities that could have happened, nothing very complex or clever actually happens, character acts gets annoying as they continue to do ridiculous things which you would expect only in Aaron Seltzer movies. All characters are stereotypes, PTSD racist war veteran, mad woman, stupid cop and so on, to make cheesy short simplistic gigs all the more easier to put in the movie, most of them only funny to people that are familiar with the situation in the country.Movie with all its goofy characters, tries to send a serious critique to church, that just doesn't work in a silly comedy such as this one. Biggest mistake is that the movie, although it makes fun on the expense of everyone that a common man in Croatia talks bad about on daily basis (also a thing that is closely related to Croatian mentality) politicians, nationalists, priests, cops etc., revolves around church while trying to make it look as bad as it can. It mocks church in a way that is funny only to those who mock and dislike church (and there are many of those here, thus making such success in the theaters).If you like simple jokes on the expense of people you highly dislike, and you find profanity hilarious, than go for it, but if you expect anything more than that, or you do not enjoy making fun of people mostly in a mean and not clever way, this movie isn't for you.We just have to wait for another movie that will bring Croatian cinematography from the dead, this is just mindless fun for a common Joe, to relax and get his mind of everyday troubles. I can't say that I expected much from a movie made by taxpayers money (HRT, Croatian National Television, production).

Before watching this, I'd encountered mixed reviews for the movie, from raves, through "meh, it's was OK", to "absolute sh*t". Now... my opinion in the end is somewhere between the last two categories, and I'll explain why shortly...Someone mentions "authentic acting"... Oh really? Yeah, I guess it might pass as authentic to someone without ANY knowledge of the setting it's supposed to be in. Almost NONE of the actors make any attempt at sounding like any Croatian islander -> to someone from someone from another part of Croatia, to whom everyone in Dalmatia, despite its obvious linguistic variety and abundance of dialects, "sounds the same", yeah, it would be OK as it's a mishmash of whatever the actors think sounds Dalmatian, but to someone aware of how it's supposed to sound, it ends up being as "authentic" and "genuine" as someone suddenly doing a gangsta rap in the middle of a movie set in the Victorian period, only without the comic potential. Even if he did that so that it wouldn't sound like "any island in particular", it sounds like "no island ever, possibly, with a dash of the Tower of Babel, as no two sound alike".It's a problem that has plagued the Croatian cinematography incessantly ever since, ironically, its independence, and Brešan, unfortunately IS one of the torchbearers of that notion, that echoes even today through abysmal trainwrecks like Larin Izbor... but that's a different story altogether.Even after 16 years, Brešan seems unable to deviate from his "island + simple people + a "village idiot" (this time a "generic insane woman" and not a "generic dimwit", but it boils down to the same thing) + a comedy that grows into (or in this case, degenerates) a tragedy + "everything that's funny is revealed or hinted at in the trailer, so the true laughs are rare in between" with just a dash of "aftereffects of the war" formula, while still not understanding how the islands sound and function, viewing them from an almost colonialist perspective. Clichés are thrown around early on to establish an "atmosphere" and the main character, the likable Mikić is one the rare few whose acting might feel right or genuine, as he's not really supposed to be from the village, established to be an outsider of sorts...There is some good humor in here, however, ranging from subtle background stuff, body humor, to almost obvious gags (that don't aaallways work) and it almost seems like he'd thrive in an all-out farce, and that makes the "tragedy" bits all the more banal. They feel tacked on, forced, thrown in with no grace, just to drive in a point.The movie pokes fun and/or attacks a lot of aspects the Catholic church and clergy, in Croatia or in general, while not really religion itself, on many fronts, with varying success. One might not say the church itself, just the corruption inside it... Some stuff works, some doesn't... Some is subtle, some isn't. The hypocritical "enemies in public but friends / identical privately" aspect of (Croatian) politics is also mocked... The efficiency of the humor and its parody value varies from viewer to viewer I guess.I just hope that Brešan tries to experiment for once and tries to put a movie in another setting. If he's trying to draw attention to the islands, and their problems, he's just doing it wrong, ignoring or not understanding their culture. Completely wrong. The sad thing is that most people won't notice. And who can blame them when they've only been served stuff like this.This could've and should've been better.PS. The geography of the place also makes no sense at first glance, at least if we assume that people can't walk over water. It just looks bad at times, with characters entering the scene from a direction they simply shouldn't come from. I could be wrong and I'll gladly edit this if it turns out that I'm mistaken.

Croatian cinema isn't well known in Europe, mainly because of the war that took place here in the nineties and practically put a stop to any serious film productions. But it isn't just Europe that ignored Croatian films. Home audiences also got used to skipping them. It took a lot of time to change that and in the new millennium things started to slowly get better. It still awaits wider recognition but the productions get more numerous every year and the films get more and more diverse. Positive reviews and awards won at international festivals also encouraged people to go to the cinema and see a domestic production. Riding on that wave a new film by well known Croatian director Vinko Brešan called "Svećenikova djeca" ("The Priest's Children") came to the Croatian film theatres and made the biggest opening ever for a domestic film."Svećenikova djeca" tells the story of a young priest named Fabijan who came to work on a small Croatian island. It takes only a short time for him to notice how the population is rapidly decreasing, but after a seller from the only kiosk on the island confesses to him how he "kills people" by selling condoms to everyone, Fabijan gets a great idea. He teams up with the seller (later the pharmacist joins them too) and they start piercing condoms, thus bringing the possibility of pregnancy back in God's hands.As you can imagine, that makes for a lot of hilarious situations. The problem is not all of them are that hilarious. Brešan can't seem to break off his mould, revisiting the same or similar setting and characters in each of his films, small island with a close-knit community where everyone represents some stereotype. The audience here is largely used to laugh at stereotypes but for a little more demanding film fan it's just not enough. The other main problem with not just Brešan's but almost all of the Croatian films is acting. For some reason most of Croatian actors can't (or won't?) make their characters feel natural. Their performances feeling staged and unconvincing for a film. It's probably because of their theatrical backgrounds but that's an explanation, not an excuse. To be fair, there are a couple of good performances in the film, especially that of Nikša Butijer as Petar, the seller, with a mixed one by Krešimir Mikić in the main role. There are two things that particularly got my attention, one very bad and one very good. The bad one is music by Mate Matišić (also a screenwriter). It's unimaginative and repetitious with main theme playing over and over again. The good one is cinematography by Mirko Pivčević. The shots are simply fantastic, giving a greater sense of characters and plot and providing beautiful scenes at the same time.Considering all of the above, it could be hard to understand what drove all those people in the cinema, but it's in fact very simple. Croatia is a country still greatly divided between secular and religious, in fact just right now there is a big debate on Health Education with fierce rhetoric from both sides. Considering the main good guy is a priest (and the main bad guy too as it unveils in the end) and the film looks at both the good and the bad face of the Church, it's destined to attract people from both sides of the conflict. But what makes the film interesting for home audiences doesn't necessarily make it so for the rest, especially when you consider that what is a flat out comedy right until the very end, makes a shift so abrupt that it just doesn't make sense (even with all the implications and message it's supposed to deliver) and ends as a great tragedy. "Svećenikova djeca" isn't a bad film, but it becomes obvious that it won't be Brešan who will put Croatian cinema in the focus of the film world.