The War I Knew (2014)

A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

One of the worst ways to make a cult movie is to set out to make a cult movie.

True to its essence, the characters remain on the same line and manage to entertain the viewer, each highlighting their own distinctive qualities or touches.

Strong acting helps the film overcome an uncertain premise and create characters that hold our attention absolutely.

This is one of those films that is hard to describe without employing inventive expletives of the most Anglo Saxon nature. However, I shall try – the synopsis is a British paratroop squad are dropped miles from their drop off point and all but one are wiped out and then the sole survivor, Jonny, has to get back to his lines and grow a pair etc.Now the mistakes pile up faster than an Enron executive planning excuses. He stops to bury the dead, carries a Luger (that always goes down well if one is captured) and wanders about in the 'French' countryside in the total open. Then he meets some other lost solders and they have some unconvincing and lack lustre japes in the Lancashire countryside. Yes that is where this guffathon was filmed North England which surprisingly does not make a good double for Normandy. The special effects are excruciatingly bad. Some of the acting raises a smile but to be extremely fair there are some reasonable performances here ostensibly from Paul Harrison as Jonny, James Boyland as Murphy (don't even get me started on the gay sub plot though) and the American Adam Woodward. Others are less convincing but I think that is mostly because the script is soo contemptibly awful. Language often used is of a modern vocabulary and seems totally incongruous for some Brit Tommies in WW2. It was originally called 'The War I Knew' and is based on actual 'accounts' what are they then? I think it must be that some men dressed up and did some fighting ? Am I even close – well we will never know as these priceless sources are yet to be revealed. I tried to find some positives and apart from the acting – in places – the only other one I can think of is that this is easy to watch on fast forward as you will miss nothing. Not the worst war film ever but one that should be given very serious consideration – avoid like a drunken dance off in a mine field.

My husband loves World War II movies, I think they are OK. He bought this DVD under its UK title of D-Day Survivor because of the action packed cover. When he watched it he complained to me that the cover was misleading (I agree) because he felt it was lacking in the action and battles that he loves, but the kind of movie I would like.I watched it and really enjoyed it. I thought the characters were very engaging and believable. It even had moments that made me chuckle. This is not a typical war movie. I would say it's a very entertaining, intelligent drama. So if you are looking for the typical action packed, battle after battle war flick this may not be your cup of tea.

I was hoping for so much more. The opening scene, at night, was so grainy and purple I felt sure it was shot on a cheap smartphone. There is a huge "leap from nowhere" after a completely inadequate "action" scene, in which the protagonist mysteriously teleports from behind a tree into a barn. Rather like the "with one bound, he was free" writing of Edgar Rice Burroughs. Most of the rest seemed to have been borrowed from a tourist promotion for walks in rural France, with the exception of some dreadfully acted scenes which frankly were annoying because I felt that they were on the edge of belittling those who actually were in the war. My overwhelming impression is that it had a budget of about a hundred quid.

I created an IMDb account just to say something about this film. First of all, the whole film is about the 3 stooges and the dumb and dumber combined. Though not as funny as the latter. They begin the story with the man in the machine gun, and some asshole dude told this johnny boy to stay alert because the krauts are all over the place. At that instance, I almost throw my coffee cup at our smart TV. Thankfully I didn't. After some hassle and haggle with the bullets flying all around, only johnny boy survived the carnage. The stupid dude, together with the royal forces were wipe out. So johnny went for a walk and stumble upon a homo krauts along the way, there they exchange pictures of their love ones and parted ways, then suddenly an English homo shot the homo krauts. From then on, a series of homo story begin with plenty of ridiculous moments in between. To make the story short, the war ended, and one of the stooges married the leader of the french resistance, whose weapon is her twinkling eyes. Sooooo stupid......The movie is HORRIBLE and ANNOYING! A complete waste that shouldn't be recycled.