Hardbodies (1984)

There are better movies of two hours length. I loved the actress'performance.

I am only giving this movie a 1 for the great cast, though I can't imagine what any of them were thinking. This movie was horrible

A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

Actress is magnificent and exudes a hypnotic screen presence in this affecting drama.

I first saw this movie when I was living on Guam in the mid-to-late-80's. I was cleaning out old VHS tapes when I ran across this one. Popped in the VCR and cleaned and watched at the same time. It was as fun a movie today, as it was nearly a quarter-century ago. Grant Cramer as Scotty Palmer has gone on to have an impressive resume and is still working in 2008. Sad to say that his girl from the movie, Kristi played by Teal Roberts did two movies in 1984 and played at stripper in Beverly Hills Cop II and a dancer in The Last Boy Scout and that was about it for her. I really thought at the time that she had a big future in movies as she was really an attractive woman and could act, at least in my opinion. Courtney Gains played Rac and went on to play Malachai in The Children Of The Corn and he is still going strong today. Again, I thought his girl in the movie, Kimberly, played by Cindy Silver, might just go on to have a decent career, but alas, she did two movies in 1984 and that was it. The movie, not to give anything away, is a mostly teen beach party type movie. Scotty is trying to help three older dudes learn to dialog the girls and in the end to get laid as well. Yes, there is some nudity, but it is not over-done in the least. For a fun look back this is a great movie for a rainy Saturday afternoon. Can't see the user rating of 3.8. It is worth every bit of a 7 at least.

I have always enjoyed watching this movie. The movie features a few actors that are still working today. This movie also feature before the "big hair days and makeup" of the rock band Vixen, who would later score some minor hits during the mid to late 80's Glam Hard Rock era.

With a title such as this, it could lead people to believe the following film depicts pornographic material. Although it displays numerous unsheathed young females, it is far from erotic. Scotty Palmer (Grant Cramer), a young man blessed with the gift of the gab, is propositioned by three middle-aged businessmen, in order to teach them the tricks of the trade with the opposite sex. Being in a hopeless predicament, due to his dispirited landlord, Scotty agrees to coach his newfound buddies, where he gets to live in prosperity, seeing they've rented the hippest pad on the beach. Soon, however, sour grapes appear on the horizon, when one of them puts the moves on his girlfriend Kristy (Teal Roberts), and Scotty finds himself out on the street once again. Enlisting his best buddy Rags (Courtney Gains), he fights back in order to prove to Kristy that he is the only one for her. It is certainly perplexing to understand how this tommyrot actually spawned an equally mindnumbing sequel, Hardbodies 2 (1986). Trivia note - star Grant Cramer actually became involved in the O.J. Simpson murder case as he was a good friend of the late Nicole Simpson Brown.

It is rare when a writer seems to flawlessly catch the rhythm of a local "dialect" of english and the writer of "HardBodies" did a fantastic job of capturing the beach/surfer/valley "lingo" in this film. Not only this, but the movie had a highly original plot, great characterizations, a minimum of stereo types and many memorable phrases. The story revolves around three older divorcee males who come to the beaches of California looking for some fast action with the local bubble headed beach babes. Their ineptness at catching any action leads them to hire a down on his luck beach bum to teach them that the girls were even more bubble headed than they originally thought!(No person ever stayed a virgin underestimating the IQ of a bikini wahine). The tides are turned on the bum when the newly enlightened lotharios use their talents on his own girl friend. There are some amusing sidelines concerning body building females, hence the title, girl rock bands, and some inept younger dorks with the same intentions as our divorcees. Of course more than your average number of buxom females turn up topless on the wayside. Altogether this is a classic of the beach movie genre.