Return to Nuke 'Em High Volume 1 (2014)

Fantastic!

Absolutely amazing

It is not only a funny movie, but it allows a great amount of joy for anyone who watches it.

Yo, there's no way for me to review this film without saying, take your *insert ethnicity + "ass" here* to see this film,like now. You have to see it in order to know what you're really messing with.

The film recaps the 1984 classic, including a few memorable nude scenes so you can keep up. The nuclear plant was bull dozed and over top of it was placed an organic food company which sells stuff to the local charter school. The green substance from the food has different effects on people from exploding heads and burning bodies to becoming "Cretins" as did the glee club.Chrissy (Asta Paredes) the main character runs a blog about the evils of Tromorganic Plant. Catherine Corcoran plays Lauren, the new girl who joins Chrissy.The humor is non-stop Troma over the top. It is inane and crude as expected. The film also has some spoofs. The teachers' names are Mr. Chips and Miss Crabtree. The principal impersonates Nixon when he talks. The party sex scene is a spoof of the party sex scene in the original 1984 film. It also has some lines that made me laugh. When Lauren was "duck raped" and had a duck's head lodged in her mouth, Chrissy says to her, "Get in, fowl mouth." Ouch! I had to laugh.Part one ends abruptly (Shades of Hobbit 2) in what appears to be a Carrie-like shower scene.Film includes exploding heads, large fake male organs, melting breasts, plus your typical Troma style blood and gore.This film will appeal to only a narrow audience, i.e. Troma fans. 8 stars on the Troma scale.Perv Guide: F-bomb, sex, and nudity (Catherine Corcoran, Asta Paredes plus about 9 others) In a few of the scenes Asta reminded me of Anne Kendricks, and that can't be all bad.

The Troma Team and Lloyd Kaufman have been on a roll ever since the 1997 release of Tromeo and Juliet. That film spawned a second golden age of Troma which gave us Terror Firmer, Citizen Toxie, and Poultrygeist. These are all some of the very best, most inspired films that the famed independent studio has put out in its nearly 40 years of existence. This golden age might have come to an end with Return to Nuke 'Em High Volume 1.This remake (I guess?) of Troma's 1986 Class of Nuke 'Em High certainly has all of the signature Troma elements in place. Gore, gross-out humor, gratuitous nudity, and social satire are present in abundance. Something seems to be missing this time around, however. Perhaps the writing is not as sharp this time. I can't quite put my finger on it. The film is also noticeably slicker than Troma's usual efforts. Lloyd Kaufman is a noted devotee of 35mm film and all of his previous directing efforts were shot on film. I'm not sure about Return to Nuke 'Em High. It almost looks like it was shot digitally. There are also a number of CGI effects this time around, which I think is a first for Troma. The cast was quite good and the actors did their best with the uneven script. I liked the soundtrack quite a lot also.To sum up, Return to Nuke 'Em High Part 1 will not rank among Troma's best. It does not compare to The Toxic Avenger, Terror Firmer, Citizen Toxie or Poultrygeist. It just didn't knock my socks off like those films did. However, it is an entertaining film with a few moments of brilliance. It is certainly better than Class of Nuke 'Em High Parts 2 and 3. Here's hoping that Part 2 is an improvement. The trailer looks promising.

It looks like this return to Tromas' popular "Nuke 'Em High" series will be one that will divide people. Some may embrace it, others may be either sorely disappointed or even offended. Of course, the whole point of a Troma film is gleeful, in your face insanity with no regard for restraint or political correctness. Everything is fair game with this sequel, directed by none other than Lloyd Kaufman himself. He guides everything with a flair for the utterly childish, the incredibly stupid, and the unapologetically manic. Personally speaking, this viewer had a reasonably good time with it. When it scored a hit, it was very funny, but it could also be pretty tiresome at times. And that, as well, may turn off some viewers because of the "trying too hard" aspect to the presentation.The movie is a melange of sex, nudity, budding lesbian romance, extremely tacky and yet very colourful gore, goof ball songs, (mostly) way over the top performances, and satirical jabs. The "story" deals with a health food outfit, Tromorganics, setting up shop where the Tromaville nuclear power plant used to be. Wouldn't you know it: whatever secret ingredients they're using turn out to be deadly, either destroying or transforming the student body at Tromaville High. For one thing, the glee club turns into a marauding band of "Cretins" with a taste for violence and abuse.The mostly no name cast does act with gusto. Foxy ladies Catherine Corcoran (as rich new girl in school Lauren) and Asta Paredes (as rebel blogger Chrissy) are very easy on the eyes. Babette Bombshell (now there's a name for you) is amusing as the principal; B movie legend Debbie Rochon plays the part of Coach Kotter and Lloyd himself turns up as nefarious Lee Harvey Herzkauf.Ultimately, what's unfortunate about this movie is that it exhausts its better material early on and does lose a fair bit of momentum. At least the ending does appropriately leave one wanting more and waiting to see what happens in Volume 2.Six out of 10.

Tonight I saw this film. A film I was excited for. I thought Class of Nuke 'Em Hight was a fun film. And them revisiting this I thought would be really great. Right now I'm going to say it straight, I'm not going to just bullshit and say I thought this film was good. It's not good, it's horrible, it's so very bad. And people are going to say "Oh Troma films are meant to be bad" Yes I know that, but this film is offensive and again don't say "Troma films are meant to be offensive, you just got too offended" No. I know these films are meant to be that way, but this film pushed it way too far and was just horrible and disgusting.Here's why:This film does jokes that it may think itself are funny, but they are not.Farts are the one thing that was just not funny about this film. You hear one in the first five minutes, and then throughout the whole film, stupid annoying fart noises are thrown in and I'm thinking to myself "What are we ten years old?" Do the makers really think that an audience will seriously think fart noises every ten minutes or so will make the audience laugh loads? No it's just childish and stupid and was so annoying. But that is the least of the offensive things about this film.A school shooting jokeYeah that is right, the writers thought they were so funny by putting in a school shooting joke. No. Here's how the scene goes, all the students are in the cafeteria and then you hear a load of guns shooting, and one student stands up and goes "Don't worry it's just a school shooting, happens all the time! CNN don't even report them anymore" This joke was disgusting and wasn't needed and these type of jokes are never funny.Movie Theatre Shooting jokeThe gang in the film first beat up a woman, and then the leader of the gang then goes "Lets go and shoot up a movie theatre" Writers what the hell were you thinking? Why did you think it was alright to write this in? This is a horrible and disgusting joke, and another one that was not needed. I've lost a lot of respect for the writers and director over this.Race jokesThere's one scene where a character walks on scene and he's a black character. His name comes up on the screen and underneath him it says "He's black" all the other characters do actually have something written about them and the writers chose to write this. Another race joke is where it stereotypes black people and one character goes "You can't even walk about this neighbourhood in a hoody and eating skittles without getting shot" and another character replies with "You're talking about black people" No this was distasteful and unfunny.Rape JokesThere's three in this film. One where such a thing as "Duck rape" happens. A woman has a duck stabbed into her mouth, this wasn't funny and was just stupid. Another scene where a woman with a giant penis says the line "This isn't duck rape, this is dick rape" and then slaps a guy round the face with her giant dick. Yeah that happens and once again is not funny. And another scene at a party where a guy goes "Maybe if I find a girl drunk enough here, she'll sleep with me" I know this scene doesn't say the word rape in here, but it was putting that across and it was disgusting.This film is just disgusting, distasteful and tries too hard to be shocking. It's a shame when I had respect for Troma for being a great independent studio that have survived and been around for so long. I just feel that this shouldn't have been made, and this is only Volume 1. Volume 2 is out next year, set straight after the end of this. Lets just hope that isn't as disgusting and disrespectful as this!