TerrorVision (1986)

You won't be disappointed!

As Good As It Gets

Absolutely the worst movie.

In truth, there is barely enough story here to make a film.

"TerrorVision" is an odd sci-fi/horror/comedy that seems to wear its "Poltergeist" influence on its sleeve. Either that or the filmmakers didn't care enough to hide the debt they owe to that movie.The plot is about an otherworldly monster that comes - where else? - through the TV. Its arrival is even noticed by a cute little blond kid, a boy this time (Heather O'Rourke, R.I.P.).The movie also doubles as a kind-of satire about middle class attitudes of the time as "Poltergeist" did, though that is barely noticeable. I liked the patriarch complaining about the punk/metal slacker his daughter brings home to meet the family, saying he looks ridiculous while putting metal chains around his neck to draw attention to his ample chest hair (they're preparing for a "'swingers' party", you see).I admit I will watch anything with Diane Franklin in it. She's barely recognizable this time around, so heavily punked up you wonder why her parents are so shocked at the sight of her boyfriend - his own parents would probably be more shocked to see her.I mentioned the movie was "odd" at the beginning of this review. I said that for a couple of reasons: one, despite the movie apparently being set in boring, staid 1980s suburbia, the house the characters live in looks like something out of "A Clockwork Orange". There are all kinds of weird art deco touches to the furnishing, like doors that belong on a submarine airlock. There's even semi-pornographic art work on the walls.The other weird thing about this movie is that all the blood in it is green. Not just the monster blood (paging R.L. Stine) - I mean the human blood. I couldn't work out why humans in this movie have green blood. Was that simply to avoid a stronger rating? Overall, it's an enjoyable movie for horror/b-movie fans which unsurprisingly died on a theatrical release. It's not "a truly wretched movie" (Janet Maslin) - if you're a fan of these types of movies, you know there are much worse out there. It's well enough made, well enough acted, funny at times, and has some cool gore effects.

This horror/comedy is excessive and crazy and has its moments. It is not great by any means, but it has a grotesque monster so there is that. It is also a Charles Band film so even if you do not like one of his films, you will not have to suffer long because it is going to be short. I wonder if he does that on purpose. As I said, I see his name in the film, I do not necessarily expect a good film; however, I do know I will be watching a horror film that will be over in under an hour and a half. Every now and then you get an entertaining film too. This one had some moments, but it was kind of stupid at the same time. The main actor in the film is a kid and he is not all that good, not all that bad. He kind of sets the tone for the acting through the movie and that is excessive. The parents are over the top, the grandfather is over the top, the sister is over the top and pretty much everyone is over the top. That being said, I do believe it is on purpose in this one, I just think that is the tone of the film. An over exaggerated over the top mess! Even the monster is an over the top mess, but it looks rather good and much better than the computer generated monsters in B movies today.The story has some icky looking monster inside a containment unit where it is seemingly turned into energy and jettisoned into space. Unfortunately, this energy beam bounces off numerous planets and ends up blasting the Putterman's newly installed satellite dish. Soon the television is picking up an amazing amount of channels including one that has a slimy monster that does not do anything but stare at those watching the television. The son and grandpa soon run afoul of the beast as it has the ability to transmit itself in and out of the television. Chaos abounds as mom and dad come home with another couple as they are swingers, the daughter brings home a heavy metal freak and the local horror host stops by to enjoy the madness! The film is very 80's and I do believe the film purposely goes excessive with the decade. The parents are swingers and their house is decorated in a style that is reminiscent of the family in Beetlejuice if they were more into sexual art. The boyfriend is into heavy metal, the son enjoys hanging out with his grandpa who is into military actions and then there is the daughter who is sporting the multicolored hair and who is very pretty by the way. By far the cutest gal in the film, though the actress playing the horror movie hostess does have the best boobies in the flick.So the film was okay in parts, bad in parts but even when it is bad, I have to think that it was being done purposely. It just seems they way the film plays out is exactly as they wanted it to be and though it is groan inducing at times, I still have to think that this is what they wanted. The film actually looks rather good considering it was released in 1986, I watched another film earlier tonight from 1987 and it looked much older than this one did. The monster is shown a lot in this one and there is stuff going on quite a bit. This film did something though that happens a lot in horror films, they killed off people too quickly. One minute there are lots of people to kill, and in less than five minutes everyone is nearly dead! Still, it was quick paced and it did not last long, sure it is always nice to have the kills spread out, but it does not hurt this film too much. Just hard to rate this one, like I said, it is kind of bad, but once again, I think that was done purposely.

This is a cheesy, scatter-shot movie. What's worse, you get the impression that the movie is trying to be goofy on purpose. At the very least, this is not a movie that's invested in taking itself seriously. In fact, with all of the bright colors, over-the-top performances and silly monster, this could almost pass for a kids movie......if it wasn't for all the gore and sexual innuendo. Whoops.Now, that can actually make for a pretty fun time, all told. And there are moments where TerrorVision is good old fashioned camp.There are a lot of problems that drag this movie down, unfortunately. For one, that sense of humor doesn't always hit. TerrorVision straddles the "funny-bad" line, and it frequently leans more towards the bad side with its humor. This is one of those movies where it does something stupid and then kind of winks at you because we're all supposed to be in on the joke. That takes a deft touch and the movie is a little clumsy, but at least the actors seem to be having fun.Then there's the monster. As far as "iconic" movie monsters go, the monster in TerrorVision is genuinely ugly... just not especially interesting or memorable. It's an unintelligible mess of slime, eyes, tentacles and teeth without any sense of cohesion or aesthetic charm. A random pile of garbage, basically, and it's hard to believe it's threatening or even very mobile.Then there's the simple fact that the movie is has a problem staying focused. It's often hard to tell where the plot is going, and while that can be a good thing in some movies, TerrorVision is a little too in love with its own wacky sense of humor. By the third act, it briefly turns in to a completely different (and significantly worse) movie entirely, making it difficult to care about the characters, their plight, or what's going to happen next.I have a hard time classifying TerrorVision as a "bad" movie in spite of these shortcomings. It has some good, cheesy fun. It mainly just feels really sloppy, kind of like it's monster.

This movie is an all-time classic! Filled with wonderful characters and classic one-liners. If you grew up in the 80's and liked metal and monster movies, then trust me, see this movie, it's totally unique. Every line in this movie is funny. It has a sort of dreamlike quality, that makes the humor and glop go together like liver and ice cream! Graham and Woronov are brilliant in their absurd roles.Basically this is a sci-fi horror comedy from the producers of "Re-Animator" and from the studio that made that movie known as Empire Pictures! Sure the acting is kind of bad and the plot is a bit absurd but hey this movie is just plain goofy fun. The director intended it to be a cartoonish kind of film, the film has excellent creature effects and a dark sense of humor. The script tosses in a buxom late-nite movie hostess, guaranteeing that wife-swapping, head-banging, machine-gunning and relentless squishing won't deprive us of flesh. Though never really over the top, "Terror Vision" is consistent fun.Overall rating: 7 out of 10.