Jersey Shore Shark Attack (2012)

Sick Product of a Sick System

Good films always raise compelling questions, whether the format is fiction or documentary fact.

A movie that not only functions as a solid scarefest but a razor-sharp satire.

It's a feast for the eyes. But what really makes this dramedy work is the acting.

The 1916 Shark Attacks did happen though -- the director if he wanted to do this film I think he should had gotten the definitive book on these shark attacks. this was a fun movie for the kind of horror film it is because you normally don't get the humor mixed in with there unless it was Deep Blue Sea or JAWS. Anchor Bay's entry in this genre I have it admit I am a little impressed; but if the guys who wrote this film want information where they can get this book I am going to do additional notes with The Decade Treatment of my first anthology as I've contributed to the killer shark genre myself. Though I the director of Ghost Shark should had did a search on the web to see if the supernatural shark story hasn't been done before or not because I wrote this kind of story nine years earlier in 2004. So I grabbed this when I came back from Richmond, Virgina, it is not a bad buy for $7 at Walmart. For an R rated movie there is no swearing in the damn thing.Deep Blue Sea is a little more hardcore but this is better than the Shark Attack movies. I do want to get a hold of the director of this movie and track down Dr. Richard Fernicola so the guy can have both of us as consultants on shark attack behaviour because sharks don't attack humans unprovoked unless you're dealing with a bull shark. So what they captured is the bull shark aggression and temperament.

This is a movie which is SOOO atrociously bad that I am ashamed to rate it, let alone write a review. Don't even know where to start. The protagonists of the movie are despicable and hateful to watch "perform" in this atrocious movie. I read other reviews and am fully aware of the fact that this movie was made to be intentionally bad. But it's just an insult to sharks and good taste in general. And the "special" effects are to be abhorred.In fact there is nothing good about this movie, he he, except a "spectacular" dancing scene somewhere in the middle. Yeah anyway what am I getting all upset about it. If people enjoy watching it and other people have fun making it, so what. Still a bad movie though.Enjoy.

New Jersey shore's "Seaside Heights" residents get ready to celebrate the Fourth of July holiday. Meanwhile, cartoon-like sharks begin killing people. The animated creatures are called albino sharks and have an old score to settle. During the deadly heat-wave of 1916, the boardwalk construction attracted sharks with vibrations. After hefty former "N-Sync" singer Joey Fatone is attacked, everyone thinks the danger is over. But the sharks have an insatiable appetite. Body-builder Jeremy Luke (as TC, meaning "The Complication") and bronzed girlfriend Melissa Molinaro (as Nooki) are the stars. There is some humor attempted throughout this TV movie revision of the shark classic "Jaws" (1975). For a couple of reasons, the best part of this movie is the ending.** Jersey Shore Shark Attack (6/9/12) John Shepphird ~ Jeremy Luke, Melissa Molinaro, Daniel Booko, Joey Russo

Jersey Shore Shark Attack (2012) ** 1/2 (out of 4) If you're looking for the mastery of Spielberg then it's best that you stay away from this flick but if you're just looking for some cheap entertainment then this here is without question one of the best films that SyFy has done (I know that's not saying too much). The story is pretty simple as the Jersey Shore comes under attack from some albino sharks over the July 4th weekend. JERSEY SHORE SHARK ATTACK works fairly well because the filmmakers were smart enough to realize that they were making a cheap, low-budget movie and it works best because it knows its limitations and instead of pretending to be something it's not, the film instead has fun with its targets. Of course the TV show Jersey Shore is under attack here and throwing in a knock-off of JAWS was just icing on the cake. I've never seen an episode of the television show but it's pretty hard to miss any of its cast members and I thought this movie did a pretty good job at making fun of them. The fighting, drinking, partying and various other things that they do were all spoofed pretty well here and we even get a Snooki wannabe in "Nooki" that is pretty darn funny. The entire spoof aspect of the film works extremely well and a lot of the credit has to go to the cast members who actually turn in good performances. Yes, by doing a spoof that allows the cast to overact and have some fun so that should be taken into credit. I'm not sure if any of them will have long careers but they can at least say they did a nice job here and especially Jeremy Luc as "The Complication" and Melissa Molinaro as Nooki. We even get Paul Sorvino (yes, the GOODFELLAS guy), Vinny Guadagnino and Joey Fatone making cameos. Fred Olen Ray produced this thing so that should tell you all you need to know. We get some pretty gory kills, which will make horror fans happy and we're also given some of the worst CGI effects that help add some laughs. The sharks themselves all look incredibly silly but they too add to the low-budget charm. JERSEY SHORE SHARK ATTACK is far from a masterpiece and it's not even a "good" movie but I give everyone involved credit for knowing what they were doing and at least delivering a fun movie.