Kill 'em All (2012)

So much average

Sick Product of a Sick System

It's fun, it's light, [but] it has a hard time when its tries to get heavy.

If the ambition is to provide two hours of instantly forgettable, popcorn-munching escapism, it succeeds.

Coming off the heels of other recent, impressive fight flicks like THE RAID and UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: DAY OF RECKONING is KILL 'EM ALL, the second film to receive a wide release from director Raimund Huber who's in the process of perfecting the style of Thailand-set, Thai-looking action films made by a westerner. In contrast to its direct competition, KILL 'EM ALL is relatively small in scale and has sections of the story which definitely could have been written better, but it's still a remarkable powerhouse of diverse fight choreography done right, relatively intriguing characters, and a well-executed premise.The story: eight ace assassins are drugged, kidnapped, and awaken in an enclosed "killing chamber" where a voice over a loudspeaker (Gordon Liu) instructs them how they're expected to kill each other until only one remains. It will take ingenuity and persistence on their parts to find their way out of this alive.The first half of this picture feels like a martial arts-themed take on Saw, with the characters stuck in the room and being subjected to the instructions that pit them in one-on-one showdowns. Though some of the assassins are obviously expendable (e.g. poor Erik Schuetz, still waiting for a good role), there's a good deal more genuine acting and personality-exposition going on during this part of the film than one might expect, resulting in the viewer being able to take a genuine interest in some of the fighters beyond their action scenes. The majority of the acting falls upon the only real thespian of the bunch, non-martial artist Johnny Messner, and while an okay character, I think he's the most detracting part of the film, having been written as overly talkative and sarcastic, especially in the second half. Additionally, while the second and more conventional half of the film might disappoint some viewers who had really gotten into the setup of the first half (for the record, I wasn't), it's the eventual reveal of the master plan behind the whole plot that's universally disappointing and that keeps the movie from a five-star rating.However, like the best martial arts pictures, this one's fourteen fight scenes dutifully pick up the slack where the story falls short. Having seen the movie only recently, I can confidently state that karate flicks of the New Year have their work cut out for them in matching the action of KILL 'EM ALL. Much of it, of course, has to do with the fine casting of unique fighters. There are acrobatic tricksters (e.g. Rashid Phoenix), hard-edged muay thai exponents (e.g. Ice Chongko), physical powerhouses (e.g. the male lead henchman), realism-based hand-to-hand practitioners (e.g. the late karate god Joe Lewis), and several more. Equally important to the strength of the fights is the truly masterful choreography by star/fight wrangler Tim Man. While not every brawl in the film is a grade-A affair, Man shows great ingenuity in not only allowing each of the performers to play to their physical strengths and therein nullifying the need for stunt doubles, but also in matching the subsequent diverse styles of the fighters harmoniously: even for the final showdown when a methodical kickboxer (Ammara Siripong), a grounded kung fu practitioner (Gordon Liu), and an acrobatic fighter (Tim Man) are pitted in combat, no fighter has to modify his style for the others, resulting in a very unique match.Personally, I think this feature is unique enough just for being the last movie of the departed Joe Lewis' sporadic film career, which had been hit & miss thus far but I'm glad that his last one could be a winner. Though he died just months before this one's DVD release at age 68, his performance is stellar: despite appearing heavyset and visibly aged, Lewis' character gets a look in his eyes when it's time to fight that makes you believe he's going to sincerely beat the stuffing out of someone, and his rough, practical moves back it up. This aspect and all the rest accumulate for a very good martial arts flick - definitely one of the best of last year.

Set in Thailand. A number of martial artists/assassins are drugged by one means or another, then kidnapped and placed in a prison/gladiator building. The room where they wake up is where they get to fight to the death. That is, the eight of them fight until seven are dead, and perhaps one is alive. First a voice from outside the room introduces them and berates them one at a time. The voice sees to it that one of them is killed just to be able to say, 'obey or die.'There is a fatal encounter, then there is a box lunch session marked by stupid conversations, with the obligatory open mouthed sloppy eating. Then there is a second fatal encounter. The winners of the two fights get to choose weapons from a room off to the side.Then they are supposed to sleep. Right. After more fatalities, a few break out of the room and start exploring the building. There are more fighters from the 'cabal.' The protagonists have to deal with them before the boss.Lots of fighting. Some trash talking. Who cares.Does anyone get out alive? Do they defeat the boss?-----Scores-----Cinematography: 5/10 Footage from many crappy locations. Odd camera angles used to lessen one's enjoyment of the visuals. Visual quality is a bit better than VHS most of the time. Sometimes we view the movie from the CCTV view point of the observer who tells the fighters the rules. Wretched colour palettes.Sound: 4/10 Sound levels suck. If the sound is set to withstand the overly loud poor choices of music, then conversation cannot be heard.Acting: 0/10 Uniformly and completely absent. The people in the film look athletic, but are not actors in any sense.Screenplay: 0/10 Ridiculous fight choreography. Dialog that is beyond stupid.

The German cover of this movie boldly advertises:"Saw meets Battle Royale". That is pretty much all you need to know, because from there it is just cheesy acting, lack of story and a combination of fight scenes. It is hard to hate this movie, after all you know what you're in for if you know the studio which released it. It contains such dialogue gems like "Four are more than one.", gently reminding the audience of the first grade/kindergarden. The choreography/fight scenes were rather well executed.It gets 3 out of 10 because it really is a trash film, if you are however into those go check it out, you might have a good laugh ;).

I was having high hopes for Kill'em all, but was left disappointed at the lack of creativity and enjoyment of this movie. it had what seemed to be an interesting plot, the idea behind it sounded cool and intriguing, but the delivery of that idea was below what is expected. the plot involves a group of highly professional assassins who got kidnapped and locked into a bunker together by a madman who forces them to play his game and fight each other to escape, for no clear reason, probably for his own sick entertainment. the fight scenes in the film were impressive to some extent, some well choreographed fight scenes that involve mainly martial arts, but they add nothing new to the hundreds of action films out there.the lead actress had some impressive moves and a cool sexy outfit, very delicious to look at.generally, the acting was just awful, very rigid and lame, those people seem like professional athletes, but just don't cut it as actors which really harmed this movie big time.the script and dialog was just as awful if not the worst i've ever seen in a movie, just awful writing, that nothing smart comes out of those actors, lame and boring dialog that i just screamed please shut up once a conversation starts !Add to that a lame villain that looks like an Asian version of Blofeld of the Bond films, minus the cat. a bold villain in a grey suit with some good fighting skills actually, he also have an army of psychopaths and ninjas that ultimately fight our heroes. " one might ask why don't he just use his ninjas to fight each other for entertainment ? "the effects were also below average when explosions were involved, something that can be made with a simple editing program on your laptop.so generally, a boring film for the most part, low grade B film with only some good fight scenes as its positive, otherwise,atrocious acting and an avoidable B film that adds nothing new or special out of all the hundreds of B action films out there.