Killer Barbys vs. Dracula (2002)
The Killer Barbies are playing at Tivoli World, a Wild West park in Spain. Komrade Irina and Komrade Ivan Ivanovich arrive from Transylvania, bringing with them the "dead" Count Dracula to be placed on display. After hearing the Killer Barbies, however, Dracula awakens, falls in love with Silvia (who looks like Charo on a bad hair day), and decides to make her his own. Realizing that they have a vampire on their hands, park owners Pepe Morgan and Martin Fierro call in the world famous, blind vampire hunter, Dr Seward. While Seward tries to track Dracula with his nose, Dracula manages to knock off a few cast members -- a faux Dracula, Bela, an acrobot with orange hair, and both Komrades Ivan and Irina. When Dracula tries to bite Silvia during a performance, Dr Seward decides to use Silvia as bait. He sends her out walking alone. When Dracula follows, they pursue and stake him. Dracula metamorphs into a white rabbit and hops away.
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Reviews
the audience applauded
How sad is this?
Blistering performances.
It’s sentimental, ridiculously long and only occasionally funny
First of all, this movies doesn't even have anything to do with the earlier movie "Killer Barbys", which also got directed by Jesus Franco. So this is not even really a sequel but what is way worse is that this movie is absolutely torture to watch, especially when compared to the somewhat bearable first movie "Killer Barbys".Was there even supposed to be a plot in all of this? The movie is filled with lots of random characters, doing all random things, without ever anything feeling connected to each other. If there was a story in all of this they sure did a great job at hiding it from me.I'm convinced of it that Jesus Franco keeps putting his wife Lina Romay in his movies just to annoy me. She is so incredibly irritating and pointless in this movie and she still can't act, despite of all of her years of experience within the business. The only character and actor that I liked in this was Dan van Husen, who played his role in a fun way. But even his role feels incredibly pointless!Guess this movie foremost serves as a promotion for the Spanish punk band The Killer Barbies. The movie is filled with sequences in which they perform some of their songs, which serves no purpose at all within the movie. And I must say, I was still kind of digging their music in the 1996 movie "Killer Barbys" but in this one it has gotten way worse and their music sounded far their formulaic. Guess that The Killer Barbies just have gotten worse over the years, which must be also the reason why they agreed to do another movie with Jesus Franco. They must have been really desperate to do so!The title and premise of this movie still sound like it's at least somewhat fun to watch but believe me, it really isn't. Because of the pacing and its incredibly bad story you'll loose interest completely, well before the movie hits the half hour mark. The movie does get worse as it progresses and I feel even somewhat reluctant to actually call this a movie. It does so much wrong and poorly that this doesn't even feel like a movie. It's just one big ugly mess, in which nothing makes sense.Congratulations Jesus Franco, you have done it again. You have succeeded once more in making one of the absolute worst movies out there!2/10 http://bobafett1138.blogspot.com/
There was a time when Franco at least tried to make entertaining movies - always sloppy (he'd shoot lots of loose footage, then resell/repackage the same stuff to different distributors under different titles); but this is even worse than Lust For Frankenstein - just a cheap amateur whack-job shot on camcorder by high school students.At least Ed Wood tried to make "important" movies - but he had a terribly overinflated sense of himself, and unfortunately - no talent.Franco has talent, and occasionally employs it, but he IS a sleaze and cheese (and he's no Joe D'Amato!) Franco's best films are the most misogynistic: SADOMANIA, BARBED WIRE DOLLS, WOMEN IN CELL BLOCK 9, THE DEMONS and EROTIC RITES OF FRANKENSTEIN - any of which you should watch before dumpster-diving into his many, many other duds.
There comes a point in every man's life when he must decide whether to gouge out his own eyes with a dull and fiery hot spoon ... or watch this movie.I wish I had taken the 1st option.In fact, I wish that I had more than 1 set of eyes to gouge out.I once thought that it would be fun to try to see the worst movie ever made. I believe now that I have. This movie is not even bad in a fun way, it's just bad.At one point, I thought that maybe this movie was meant to showcase the talent of the Killer Barbies (Note: the movie spells their name wrong). I tried to find the talent they were showcasing, and it too was terrible.
In a Wild West park in southern Spain, a rock band called KILLER BARBIES is playing a bunch of shows. Many strange characters hang around, including a guy who claims to be Count Dracula. Then, a government official from Transylvania arrives - and in the back of her car is the glass coffin with the real Dracula. He is meant to be become a tourist attraction, but soon is back from the dead after listening to the Killer Barbies' tune `Wake Up'. He gets obsessed with Silvia, the singer of the Killer Barbies. Lots of necks and bites later, the vampire hunter Dr Seward comes into town to fight the evil undead. Unfortunately, Seward is blind and the villagers doubt that he is able to stop Dracula. But if he can't, who else could?Well, you knew from the title it wouldn't be Shakespeare! But the movie has got a legendary director (Jess Franco) and three excellent veteran actors from the late 60s spaghetti westerns (Aldo Sambrell, Peter Martell and Dan van Husen) who raise the whole undertaking above the level of a normal rock band trash video. I must confess I am not a big fan of the kind of music that the Killer Barbies play. It sounds rather like tame pop than aggressive punk to me, but I still could sit the movie through without being bored for a minute. Silvia's skull bikini helped, too. The best fun moment was when one victim asked the vampire with her last breath: `Why are you such a bastard?', and Dracula replies: `I had an awful childhood!' Just like in his 70s vampire movies like `Vampyros Lesbos', Franco is not afraid of showing a vampire with a mirror image, or letting him walk in the sunshine. Surprisingly for a Spanish director, his idea of a vampire was hardly influenced by the typical Catholic iconography. Franco's vampires are described as outsiders neither bound by a particular morality code nor weaknesses such as fearing the sign of the cross. This horror comedy works by the same rules as Franco's serious movies here, but unfortunately, the visual style doesn't come anywhere near. Especially towards the end, cheap video effects like the so-called solarisation don't really serve a purpose. The speed of the finale made me aware that the movie also had a couple of pacing problems in the middle, probably because Franco never was a comedian in the first place. Voting more than 5/10 would seem unfair to Franco's masterpieces such as `Virgin Among the Living Dead' therefore - although `Killer Barbys vs Dracula' is quite some fun!