Zombie Island Massacre (1984)

I am only giving this movie a 1 for the great cast, though I can't imagine what any of them were thinking. This movie was horrible

It's funny, it's tense, it features two great performances from two actors and the director expertly creates a web of odd tension where you actually don't know what is happening for the majority of the run time.

By the time the dramatic fireworks start popping off, each one feels earned.

Through painfully honest and emotional moments, the movie becomes irresistibly relatable

I believe that there are several reasons this film has received such low scores. First, the title is somewhat misleading because, as several people have correctly pointed out, there really aren't any zombies in this film. Now, maybe this film was given this title to take advantage of the fact that zombie movies are currently in vogue. Maybe not. But with a title like "Zombie Island Massacre" the typical "zombie enthusiast" (like myself) will buy or rent the film expecting certain things. When it turns out to be something completely different it feels like the old "bait and switch". No doubt some might even feel like they were swindled. To therefore think that they would give this film a high score simply isn't logical. Another reason for the low scores might also be because of the low budget which didn't attract the best talent in Hollywood to participate. For example, Rita Jenrette (as "Sandy") was quite attractive. But her acting abilities weren't good enough to turn this film into a success. Certainly not with the rest of the cast available. Likewise, the plot was okay. However, it wasn't exactly unique as it's been done before on several occasions. In short, I don't think this was a "bad movie" per se. The problem was that it just didn't have some of the critical ingredients necessary to make this into a "good movie" considering everything else.

The word "zombie" was added to the title to titillate--as was the presence of Rita Jenrette--as nymphet whose 15 minutes of fame came when talked publicly about her and her congressman husband's supposed tryst on the steps of the Capitol building. Normally, the adventures of a horny lady such as Jenrette would have quickly fizzled in the public's mind had she not subsequently posed for Playboy and starred in this cheap exploitation picture.Those looking for zombies will no doubt be disappointed, though if you are looking for horny tourists who take off their clothes with little provocation (especially Ms. Jenrette) you will no doubt be satisfied. Heck, the film should have been more appropriately titled "Horny Island Massacre" as indeed there is lots of gratuitous killing and there's something about that tropical air that turns people into horn-dogs! Of course, given the title, the fact it was made by Troma Films AND the sleazy advertising campaign that accompanied the movie's debut, none of this should come as much of a surprise. It's NOT to be mistaken for Shakespeare and you can hardly expect more than you get.The film has no stars (other than perhaps Jenrette--the Paris Hilton of her day) and has a rather low budget. The writing is pretty dim and there are only a few surprises along the way. One of the particularly silly bits is when the remaining five people wander into a mansion at night. It's totally dark outside, yet one of them almost instantly finds a small handgun hidden in the bushes!! He couldn't have found it faster if he'd had a map! There are also some really dumb people who act almost like they WANT to be killed they behaved so stupidly! I also loved the way Jenrette emoted when her movie husband was killed--it was so embarrassingly bad it gave me a chuckle.Overall, the film is worth seeing only for the first two minutes, as you get to see an awful lot of the lovely Mrs. Jenrette--an AWFUL lot! After that, it's all down hill! A film worth watching only for bad film fan and the curious who want to catch a glimpse of Jenrette naked. All others beware!

Zombie Island Massacre (1984) * (out of 4) Incredibly poor ultra low budget flick about a group on vacation who head to an island with voodoo rituals and of course they start getting knocked off one by one. The film features a Playboy Playmate who kindly gets naked three times during the opening moments and this here is clearly the highlight. The violence is obviously fake and the gore is kept very small and what we do see looks fake as well. The film borrows heavily from the 'Ten Little Indians' storyline but none of it ever makes too much sense. The score is from Harry Manfredini who also did the score for Friday the 13th. The score here rips that one off so you F13 nuts might want to check the film out to see how the two compare. The rest stay away.

Generally, I'm a huge fan of Troma films. Troma movies are just for people with a certain affection for trash and exploitation, of course, and many of them are over-all pretty silly, but they are all somehow highly entertaining, original and memorable. At least that's what applies to every Troma movie I've seen, EXCEPT John N. Carter's "Zombie Island Massacre" of 1984. While even the sillier Troma Movies I had seen, before I saw this, were entertaining in their own way, "Zombie Island Massacre" is just plain boring.The movie is, of course, silly, but, as mentioned above, I don't mind the silliness. "Zombie Island Massacre", however, does not have any of the great qualities that make Troma flicks special and memorable. Neither is it gruesome, disturbing and ultra-violent as "Blood Sucking Freaks" nor is it demented as "Mother's Day" or hilarious as "The Toxic Avenger". These three movies are probably Troma's most famous films, of course, but "Zombie Island Massacre" does not even compare to any of the lesser-known Troma flicks I've seen. The only elements "Zombie Island Massacre" shares with many other Troma flicks are the negative ones - A thin plot and bad acting - without featuring any of the many great elements Troma's, usually wonderfully demented films normally provide.Furthermore, I can't stop wondering who was responsible for the title "Zombie Island Massacre". The film takes place on an Island, all right, but there is not a single Zombie in the entire movie. Some people are talking about Zombies in the movie, but that's it. Furthermore, I would have wished to see some more people massacred. A few people are killed of course, but this film having the word "massacre" in its title is a daring exaggeration.Anyhow, the movie, has a few (very few) funny moments, but I was disappointed in spite of its bad reputation. Even hardcore Troma fans should consider twice before wasting one and a half hours on this movie, since it does not deliver any of the great, demented qualities Troma usually stands for. 2/10