The Erotic Witch Project (2000)

A Major Disappointment

A great movie, one of the best of this year. There was a bit of confusion at one point in the plot, but nothing serious.

By the time the dramatic fireworks start popping off, each one feels earned.

One of the film's great tricks is that, for a time, you think it will go down a rabbit hole of unrealistic glorification.

I was very drunk when I first watched this and at the time I thought that it was very erotic and funny. Thinking about it though it was a bad film with no acting, story or anything except naked women in softcore action. It was a short film as most of the footage was just repeats of previous shots but mirrored to confuse the horny teenager into thinking that it is a real film. Worth watching to get horny but that's all as watching this alone normally would not be erotic or in the slightest entertaining. It was like the Teletubbies with someone shouting "again, again" before being subjected to the exact same sequence again.

This review contains spoilers.As a parody of the Blair Witch Project, this video fails miserably. The "humor" is painful. For instance, instead of mysterious stick figures, our heroines find sex toys. And as others have mentioned, there's the guy running around in the monkey suit. ?!?!?!?But as an all-girl softcore film, the video delivers quite nicely. The three girls (Katie, Darian, and Victoria) are all attractive. They get naked quite frequently and engage in some excellent twosomes and threesomes. The sex is very explicit and just barely stays within the bounds of softcore.It could have been much better. They should have ditched the monkey and lame humor and used the time for more lesbian sex romps. But I still recommend it.

In the midst of the popularity of The Blair Witch Project, it was inevitable that such a pop phenomenon would come to inspire so many parodies. Unsurprisingly, one such spoof took the soft core path, and it's probably the most popular of the bunch.Take the original plot, make it three young women instead of two guys and a girl, and put them off to the woods in the search of the legendary erotic witch and you've got the (very) basic plot for The Erotic Witch Project. Of course, these three ladies come under the influence of the erotic witch and end up getting into all sorts of lesbian encounters with one another.Since this is a softcore film, this should be reviewed on an entirely different basis than the average movie. After all, things such as acting, writing, and competent direction don't matter here. All you need to see are three attractive women who display lots of skin and get it on with one another. Even at that, it's hardly perfect, but it'll probably work up a quick fix for those who like this sort of thing (being a guy, I do like this sort of thing).The three women on hand are Katie Keane (who now seems to go by the name Laurie Wallace), a blonde; Victoria Vega, a brunette; and Darian Caine, who has dark hair. Wallace is easily the most physically attractive of the lot (which is nice considering she spends the entire last half-hour wandering around in a forest without any clothes on) and also displays the most acting ability (or maybe a better way to put it would be more enthusiasm than both Vega and Caine combined). Wallace is, in fact, one of the hottest women I've seen and even her imperfections (admittedly, her posterior has quite a bit of slightly saggy skin covered with stretch marks) actually add to that "girl next door" feel, even though she's easily hotter than anyone living in my neighborhood.She gets in at least two classic moments, the first is when she and Vega are under the spell of the erotic witch and she complains about being nude on video while Vega strips Wallace's clothes off one-by-one. The second is probably the most famous scene in the entire movie, a three-minute long parody of Heather Donahue's tearful "I'm so sorry" speech, except Keane happens to be fondling her bare breast for the entire segment. Wallace also has another sexy scene where Darian strips her, all the while claiming she's only letting her do it for documentary purposes. Then they proceed to have a very lengthy lesbian session.Full-bodied brunette Victoria Vega is also quite attractive, not nearly as much as Wallace, but certainly much preferable to Darian Caine.The Erotic Witch Project most definitely could have done without the guy running around in a gorilla suit who occasionally makes grunting noises during the lesbian scenes. And hey, it probably could have even done without Darian Caine, whose constant griping and raspy voice are more annoying than sexy. Still, this is an amusing, sexy softcore flick that Blair Witch haters will probably find up their alley.rating as an actual film: D+rating as a sofctore film: A- (would have been an A with someone more attractive than Darian Caine)

This movie is the funniest spoof I have ever seen. And better than any XXX movie ever. I hope to see the blonde in many, many more movies. I never thought that anyone could make a movie for this cheap that is this good.