Flesh Gordon (1974)

Best movie of this year hands down!

How sad is this?

Highly Overrated But Still Good

The movie turns out to be a little better than the average. Starting from a romantic formula often seen in the cinema, it ends in the most predictable (and somewhat bland) way.

Though I loathe this saying, as it's often largely unfounded and nostalgic, Flesh Gordon is precisely the kind of film that could never be made today, particularly with the conviction and the straight-faced persona that it was made with in 1974. Flesh Gordon is a softcore parody of action serials that populated radios and Televisions in the 1950's, particularly Flash Gordon and complete with all the genre's tropes: silly dialog, cliffhangers, cheesy costumes, ridiculous narration, asinine circumstances, and outlandish characters. Throw in gratuitous nudity, an occasional sex-scene, and some utterly banal dialog, and you have one of the strangest parodies of the 1970's and one of porn's most curious oddities.My level of prose will hereby be temporarily lessened as I try to thoughtfully articulate the plot of said film. It all begins with a Professor Gordon (John Hoyt), who discovers that the Earth is being manipulated by "sex rays," which turn people into horndogs. When one of these sex rays winds up striking a plane, carrying Flesh Gordon (Jason Williams) and Dale Ardor (Suzanne Fields), the plane turns into a massive orgy, with Flesh and Dale barely escaping the imminent crash. The two land near the workstation of Dr. Flexi Jerkoff (Joseph Hudgins), who is working to try and defeat the sex rays, which are powered by the evil Emperor Wang the Perverted (William Dennis Hunt) and his army of "Penisauruses." Flesh, Dale, and Dr. Jerkoff and his "assholiness" must find a way to stop Emperor Wang while combatting the forces of the manipulating sex rays.This is precisely the kind of film where intense critical analysis and discussion fails it. The more you think about Flesh Gordon and its preposterous title, plot, and existence, the less infatuated with the idea you'll become. It just about defies every cinematic convention and notion you've come to expect, not expect, and not even dream up just by its existence. It's the very definition of an oddity, and the fact that it belongs to one of the most controversial and divisive periods in American cinema's history only makes it that much more of a treasure.The strange part is that Flesh Gordon, however, doesn't always wind up being funny or erotic, rendering its purpose questionable. The sex scenes are sometimes drearily tame (rumors of footage being seized are scattered all over the internet, making me question whether or not this film was supposed to be racier or not) and the humor is sometimes absent for long stretches of the film. The inconsistencies bog down the film from being some true work of parody genius largely because it can hold its identity for too long without changing course.Nonetheless, this is a film that, again, defies a lot of conventional critical analysis, like most parody films. It's a film that works as little else than a fun deviation from the expected, and if you're a fan of Flash Gordon, and still not crippled by the desire for righteousness and moralism in what you watch, Flesh Gordon is a pleasant stroll through the kind of film that couldn't be made anymore without incessant giggling under the breathes of screenwriter's.Starring: Jason Williams, Suzanne Fields, Joseph Hudgins, William Dennis Hunt, Candy Samples, Mycle Brandy, and John Hoyt. Directed by: Michael Benveniste and Howard Ziehm.

For years, I've read of this soft-porn parody of Flash Gordon since it was advertised as one of several midnight movies listed as being at the (now defunct) Cinema 8 at the (also folded) Bon Marche Mall. While I've had it on tape for years, I've only now gotten to seeing it. The verdict: While there were some amusing scenes and dialogue and maybe some good nude scenes, I found most of it a bore. The acting, direction, and script had such an amateurish feeling that after a while I just simply wanted it to end. I did like many of the stop-motion creatures that recall Ray Harryhausen and his mentor Willis O'Brien at their most creative. I guess overall, this was too silly for my tastes. Worth a look at least once is all I can recommended for Flesh Gordon.

At a time when porn movies were inching closer to the mainstream this film was made to capitalize on that trend. Unfortunately the films cost over-runs and a subsequent police raid necessitated the removal of almost all of the hardcore material (although you can still spot a bit of X activity if you watch the revelers in Wang's throne room during the orgy sequence). Perhaps the biggest surprise of this film is that the deleted scenes have allowed this film to reach a much broader audience and has led directly to its status as a cult classic.Jason Williams plays Flesh Gordon who along with Dale Ardor (played by adorable porn star Suzanne Fields) get kidnapped by Flexi Jerkoff and together they zoom across the galaxy to stop the evil emperor Wang's sex ray from bombarding the earth.The goofy names and the sex ray subplot make in pretty clear where the humour is directed. Sure it aims pretty low but it actually works very well. It is next to impossible to be offended by any movie that is this goofy. Everything from the design of Flexi's ship to the look of the aliens puts a sexual spin on the sci-fi genre. Special credit must be given to the amazing monster (voiced by Poltergeist & The Incredibles Craig T. Nelson) that Flesh faces at the movies climax. It is a glowing tribute to Ray Harryhousen although it is given dialogue that none of his creatures would ever think to say.Sure this film is not for the timid but it can present a fun evenings viewing for any open minded adult but you may want to ignore the long after the fact sequel Flesh Gordon meets the cosmic cheerleaders. The special effects are good but the dialogue is simply too lame and it falls far short of the quality of its predecessor.

From out of the Great American Depression of the Late 1920's, which continued up to the late '30's, came a new type of Alter Ego, an Alter Ego that would distract from the poverty stricken life of the crumbling, limp and lacklustre America. This Alter Ego had a name, the Superhero, and with each new Superhero came an new and exiting Personality, standing tall and proud, such as Buck Rogers (1928), Flash Gordon (1934), Superman (1938), for examples. Originally, these would have been seen in Comic Books and Newspaper Comic Strips, and then Hollywood grabbed them with both hands and turned them into Movie Heroes.These Heroes were based on Goodness, Honesty and Freedom for the People, which would force it's way through the impotent Evils, Dangers and Repressive failures of the Antiheroes, everything the Superhero stood firmly against.Among these newfound Superheroes came Flash Gordon, who to be honest, was first drawn up to compete with Buck Rogers. Flash had two travelling companions; the archetypal female of the Superhero World, Dale Arden, and for the intellectual readers of the comic strip came Dr. Hans Zarkov. Here was Strength, Beauty and Brains, wrapped up into a neat and tidy package. All typical Superhero clichés, but in the end, effective enough at arousing excitement and interest.By the time the late Sixties had arrived, Howard Ziehm had owned a Coffee Shop, toured across the USA, and had formed a Rock Band. Unfortunately, for whatever reason, the band had split at the end of 1969, and the then Manager, William Osco, 25 at this time, and Howard, aged 29, and then found themselves in Los Angles, USA, with only forty Dollars between them. So, what else could a couple of young men do to earn money? They started making short porn movies that contained no sound.To do this, they formed their own Production Company, Graffitti Productions. Their luck and timing had stayed the distance, they were making money. With these newfound profits, they brought their own movie theatres, so they could show their own movies.Being a little more adventuress and confident due the extra funds pouring in, they wanted to make a film of great length, the idea of a Sci-Fi parody then came to seed, this idea grew into what is now known as Flesh Gordon. Filming began in the winter of 1971, and with an expected budget of around $25,000, at the time the most expensive porno movie budget ever; they began to enlist a cast and crew.This highly original piece of work starts of with a Rolling Text, a prologue if you like, to the past innovators of the original Superheroes, and the people that have adored their stature. It also acts as a disclaimer, as to distance its self and the original innovators from each other, and to dedicate Flesh Gordon in their Honour.The story could not be any distant if it had tried, Flesh Gordon is complete parody, ridicule, this is evident during the narration of the Rolling Text. What is new here is the first porn movie to use non-porn professional Actor's, in a non-sexual part, such as William Hunt, who plays Emperor Wang for example.Being your typical FLASH Gordon story line, planet Earth is at peril by an Evil member of the Wang Dynasty, on a far reaching Planet called Porno, and with his Evil Sex Ray, he intends to penetrate the Earth and destroy us all. Only Flesh and his two companions can save the day, It's as simple as that.Go Flesh Go.The thing that makes Flesh Gordon stand out over most Porno movies, (remember, the hard core sex movie Deep Throat, starring the late Linda Lovelace, had come out during filming of Flesh, in 1972), was not, ironically, the porn, but the direction of the script, storyline and the special effects that Flesh Gordon showed off. This could, no doubt, be due to the fact that the unfortunate Mr. Ziehm and Mr. Osco, as well as other makers of sex movies at that time, being continuity harassed by the Police authorities? Too much pressure, too much to lose at the last minute. In the end, they had been arrested several times too many, houses and movie theatres were put up as bail bonds and to add insult to injury, they were forced by Law, to remove any hard sex scenes from the movie before general release, around 400 feet of footage was taken out, leaving some 40,000 feet intact. Sadly, and with much irony, it looks like the anti sex industry that was the Law of that time, in the end, had made its own sex movie.However, was Flesh Gordon ever meant to be a sex movie, hard core or other wise? No, would seem the appropriate answer; this movie was sold on the pretence of it being a Cult movie that contained a few sex scenes. After much back biting, bitterness, double dealing, the use of cocaine and one too many Police visits, Flesh Gordon took over three years to complete and cost, in the end, at least $5000,000. When they first solicited this movie, after completion, in New York, no theatre would offer their services, this movie was just too long for it's own good.There was one theatre in New York that would give them their break; the rest is history, Messer's Ziehm and Osco, who when first started out in this business were out of their depth, totally naive and inexperienced, had now flourished into Cult Movie making status.Flesh Gordon, with its well-made effects, costumes and well-earned respect, is a movie of originality, irony, bravery and determination. Seeing this movie is a pleasure of the Heart and Soul, to relish in a bygone age of what, ironically, Flesh Gordon stood against, the oppression of an Evil Repressive Dynasty, that was Censorship.Go Flesh Go.