Five for Hell (1969)

That was an excellent one.

Such a frustrating disappointment

If the ambition is to provide two hours of instantly forgettable, popcorn-munching escapism, it succeeds.

Like the great film, it's made with a great deal of visible affection both in front of and behind the camera.

This Italian action/adventure set during the Second World War is essentially a riff on the then recent American smash hit The Dirty Dozen (1967). Its story is broadly similar where we have a specially selected group of five American soldiers being chosen to go behind enemy lines to steal some heavily guarded battle plans from a well-protected German stronghold. But the question you need to ask yourself is could that earlier Hollywood blockbuster have been improved with the inclusion of scenes involving its crack commandos jumping off mini trampolines, using baseballs as weaponry and indulging in extended tap dancing routines? Well, this is the film that essentially answers that particular question. I'm not going to give you the answer though as I think it's best a person decides for themselves on such matters.This one features the go-to bad guy actor of the day, Klaus Kinski, in a role of a ruthless Nazi and the delectable Margaret Lee as a German double-agent. The five-man army, on the other hand, were decidedly less distinctive than this pair. The film itself is reasonably entertaining in a lots-of shooting kind of way but it is also very by-the-numbers too. The final assault on the German base drags somewhat until it becomes a machine gun fest. So I reckon it could have been a bit more interesting really but in fairness, like its title characters, it still gets the job done.

Spaghetti/War film about a misfit team led by Gianni Garco who carry out a suicide mission behind enemy lines . A group of two-fisted soldiers formed by five experts are drafted to go on a near-suicide mission and attempt to take plans from a Nazi staff . ¨ Five for the Hell¨ is an entertaining film with Gianni Garco as tough officer along with the ordinary team of renegade soldiers of World War II whose mission is to steal the Nazi's secret attack plans -the Plan K on the Gustav Line- from a villa . Garco training a group of rebel and eclectic soldiers for a dangerous assault on a palace-château. In the hands of hardboiled director Gianfranco Parolini , alias Frank Kramer and a tough-as-leather cast , that's all the plot that's needed to make one rip-roaring wartime flick. Garco's mission is two-fold and in violent and cynical style : first turn his G.I.s into a valiant fighting unit and then turn them loose on a German villa located in Italia where they run into a brutal Nazi commander (Klaus Kinski) and being helped by a double agent (Margaret Lee). The diverse characters include a fun-loving Nick Jordan as acrobat , Sanson Burke as hunk man , Salvatore Borghese as safe-cracker , and Luciano Rossi as a lame-brained soldier specialist in explosives . The first half of the film allows the colorful cast of character actors to have their fun as they get their tails whipped into shape and develop shaky relationship with their leader . The final part is all action, as the brave commando wreak havoc and then run for their lives. Despite the fact that few of the "heroes" survive the bloodbath, the message here isn't that war is hell. Rather, it seems to be: war can be a hell of a good time... if you've got nothing to lose . The relentless assignment is set against strong training, risked adventures and hazardous feats . The dangerous mission includes a selected group formed by a motley and varied squadron played by usual of Italian B-series .This is a rugged WWII actioner concerning about an experienced officer , he's assigned by Military staff to train a dropout group of valiant G.I.s who get a chance to redeem themselves . They are a squadron of dispensable characters with no past and no future . Garco reprieves a bunch of soldiers , forges them into a two-fisted fighting unit and leads them on a deadly assignment into Nazi territory . The Privates are oddballs , rag-tag and undisciplined gang , under command a stiff Lieutenant and the team is hardly trained . In this film Garco and his motley band , are suppose to steal a plans located in a fortress where resides various Nazi officers . At the end they must participate in the suicidal mission behind the enemy lines , to wipe the German group by means of a violent assault over a strongly protected position .Gianni Garco as Lt. Hoffman assumes the character of commando leader in this ordinary wartime movie regularly directed by Gianfranco Parolini. This moving film packs frantic thrills, perilous adventures , comedy , relentless feats , and buck-loads of explosive action and violence. The noisy action is uniformly well-made, especially deserving of mention the rip-roaring final scenes on the fortress , including some spectacular shootouts and bombing . Apart from the values of team spirit , cudgeled by Garco into his rebel group , the film is full of feats , suspense , and thrills . Rough Gianni Garco or Gary Hudson is good as leader of the motley pack together thwart the Nazi schemes, as well as the largely secondary cast with special mention to Salvatore Borghese , a habitual comic secondary in multiple Italian films . Atmospheric and functional musical score by Mancuso and mediocre cinematography in Eastmancolor filmed by Sandro Mancori . This is a wartime typical vehicle and into the ¨warlike commando genre¨ , in USA style which also belong the American classics as : ¨Dirty Dozen (Robert Aldrich) ¨ Where eagles dare(Brian G. Hutton) and Kelly's heroes(Hutton ), Tobruk (Arthur Hiller), Devil's Brigade (Andrew V McLagen) and many others .The film is middling directed by Gianfranco Parolini or Frank Kramer. He began directing muscle-men epics as ¨Rocha¨, ¨The Macabeos¨ with Brad Harris and ¨The ten gladiators¨ with Dan Davis and Gianni Rizzo , Parolini's usual actor. After that he continued with ¨commissioner X¨ series with Tony Kendall , fantastic with ¨three supermen¨ and warlike movie as ¨5 per l'Inferno¨ with Gianni Garco (Sartana) and Nick Jordan. His first Western was ¨Johnny West¨ and later on , he directed the ¨Sabata trilogy¨ . It's followed by ¨ Return of Sabata¨ with similar artistic as Lee Van Cleff and Nick Jordan and customary technician team and finally ¨Indio Black ¨ with Yul Brynner . Rating : Average but amusing .

OK, enough is enough. Stop talking trash about this movie, obsessing over equipment or uniforms, put down your history of World War 2 facts checklist and PAY ATTENTION:Simply put, FIVE FOR HELL is a violent, cartoonish Spaghetti Western masquerading as a war film. I once encountered a very heated discussion about FOR A FEW DOLLARS MORE where contributors were trying to argue who was probably a better shot in real life, Clint Eastwood or Lee Van Cleef. (Answer: they are both ACTORS, and it's only a movie.) I sense the same kind of desperation in the bulk of the comments made here about this wonderful, stupid, energetic little movie, which has as much in common with reality as a Bugs Bunny cartoon. Italian cult genre cinema is about exaggerations. The events depicted in FOR A FEW DOLLARS MORE were no more rooted in history than FIVE FOR HELL. In the same way that DOLLARS just happens to involve cowboys shooting each other's hats, FIVE FOR HELL just happens to be about Americans and Germans shooting each other's helmets. And in the same way that DOLLARS is set in the old west, FIVE FOR HELL is set during the Second World War. Instead of being about two gunfighters who infiltrate a gang of evil Pistoleros to exact revenge & make off with their loot, FIVE FOR HELL is about a squad of commandos who infiltrate a Nazi stronghold to make off with some battle plans, or whatever it is that they are after.See, it doesn't matter what they are after, because the point of the movie is not to educate viewers about real events that their textbooks didn't cover, but to entertain people with an outrageous story, kinetic stunts, choreographed shootouts, sneering evil Nazi Waffentroops, explosions, goofy physical comedy, and a dash of risqué material involving megababe Margeret Lee. You aren't supposed to be watching it with your textbooks open but with your brains switched off. THE MOVIE IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUN, NOT REAL. So all these concerns about equipment, uniform type or whether the Nazis hung the toilet paper on the left or right side of the loo is irrelevant and distracting. With that said, I can understand why a lot of detractors may have a problem with this movie, which is that it dares to have fun with World War 2. You could say the same thing about Italian mob movies getting a thrill out of organized crime or spy thrillers exploiting the cold war for giggles or even Spaghetti Westerns making light of the cowboy experience. I wouldn't advise one doing so, but you could ...So here is a Spaghetti Western -- with all of the good, bad, and ugly that term inspires -- that just happens to have machine guns, tanks and Klaus Kinski as a Nazi, instead of having six shooters, horses and Klaus Kinski as a ruthless hired killer. His "Sartana" co-star Gianni Garko plays the tough American Lt. who leads the rabble of misfits on their hopeless mission behind enemy lines: Instead of worrying about the make of the machine guns, worry about whether they will make it back alive. Especially Sal Borgese's "Syracuse", because he's so much fun to watch. And worry about Margeret Lee: do you think that rotten Klaus is going to have his way with her? Hell, I would!! The bottom line is that this is a fantasy, a cartoon, a big colorful ripoff of THE DIRTY DOZEN that for my money is twice as entertaining, funny, and inappropriate as that movie, and about half as long. FIVE FOR HELL is a win-win situation for viewers: you are only diminished by missing it. But for Christ sake it's NOT the History Channel, it was only meant to be entertaining, and the movie is eager to please. Perhaps a bit over-eager, which would be my only complaint, and about as close as you can come to a party movie about war. If that is a bad thing my apologies, but sometimes movies are made to just be watched, enjoyed, forgotten and still leave enough room for another one just like it on a double bill. On that consideration it's a brilliant success, and a great introduction point to the genre for viewers just starting out. You can find it on DVD for a dollar, go enjoy.9/10

This is undoubtedly the worst film ever made! I challenge anyone to watch more than one quarter of this movie without going insane!